


dusting off the old life from my catholic knees

by brandywine421



Series: chiseled out of brick 'verse [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-28
Updated: 2014-02-23
Packaged: 2018-01-10 09:07:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 27,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1157808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brandywine421/pseuds/brandywine421
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Captain America's kid will be a target as soon as word gets out.  I'll be a liability, the undeniable weakness of the country's trademark superhero.  And God help me, even if I swell up and die popping out that kid, I would never take fatherhood from him if he wanted it."</p><p>He reached over when she pulled into a parking space with a screech of brakes.  He took one of her wrists in his metal fingers.  "Hey.  None of that's going to happen.  At least not on my watch, okay?  You're going to march in there, spread your legs and cough and then the doc's going to answer all these questions."</p><p>"Shut up, Bucky."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a soapy ball of fluff that's about a year or so after the first story ended. Unbetaed and simply for fun, I hope you can enjoy the snapshots of Maria and Steve's life, with a little outside melodrama as incentive. It's a linear timeline, but there are time-jumps between sections but hopefully it makes sense.

 

_dusting off the old life from my Catholic knees  
_ _I scraped them up good, I scraped them up good -  
_ _you doctored them clean_

 

**foreshadow**

It was strange having an office not at SHIELD HQ, and she would never admit it to anyone other than Steve – but it was nice.  She wasn't constantly interrupted and the only paperwork she had to deal with was Avengers related.  There was a lot of it, but not as much as she was used to.

Things had changed too much for her to fathom in the past two years.  She wished Coulson was here to see it.  He would be jealous as hell to know she was in charge of the Avengers as well as in a long-term relationship with Captain America.

Bruce knocked softly on her open door and smiled easily at her.  She liked Bruce.  She still wasn't a big fan of the Hulk, but Bruce was a good friend.

"Sorry to have to bring you bad news," Bruce said, taking one of the seats across from her desk.  Steve was the default head of the team, but he insisted on having a backup with him whenever Avengers business was discussed so there were multiple chairs in every office.

"Never start a visit like that please," Maria said but she knew him well enough to know it must not be serious.

He grinned.  "It's time for your checkup."

"My checkup?"

"Yeah.  Pepper's idea, we get regular blood tests and x-rays every six months.  There's a little research in there but it's really to make sure we're in shape when we go out there.  She's pretty impressed with how low Tony's blood pressure's been running since you took point with SHIELD," Bruce said.  "I need to get a baseline for your levels."

"You're not a medical doctor, Bruce," Maria said.  It was a good idea but she didn't think she was a part of the team in the way that she needed scheduled appointments.

"I'm not doing an actual physical, I assure you there are no stirrups in our Medbay," Bruce smiled.  "It's just a standard panel of tests and scans to make sure no one's permanently affected by the things we encounter on the job.  Clint developed an allergy to seafood after that kraken thing a few months back and we caught it before sushi night."

"Why am I on the list?  I haven't done field work in months," she said.

"Come on, Maria, set an example.  If you try and get out of it, everyone will and that will not make Pepper happy," Bruce warned.

She signed.  Pepper was _not_ fun when she was unhappy.

**dart**

"On your left, Ward, 9 o'clock," Maria said in his ear to one of the agents on their support team.

Steve smiled behind his cowl.  He liked the arrangement they'd worked out with Fury, giving Maria the liaison slot between the Avengers and SHIELD as an outside position, while letting her train their SHIELD support teams.  It was nice having the same agents backing them up every op.

"Sit-rep," Bucky called.  "I don't have anyone to shoot and I'm getting a little antsy over here."

"Slowing down on the east side – they're retreating somewhere.  Not up and not out from what I see," Tony said.

"Trickle on the west, I think Iron Man's right," Natasha added.

"I'll head into the subway," Steve said.

"I'll meet you down there," Barton said.

There was a flicker of static in his ear before Maria spoke.  "Grant, direct your team to meet up with Hulk on the west perimeter, he can stand down."

"Roger that," the agent replied before his comm cut out from the underground.  They really had to fix that.

Maria made sure their support teams were exposed to Bruce and the Hulk and it had worked wonders with keeping the green goliath under control.  Hulk would never trust soldiers pointing guns and screaming at him, but he had learned to recognize The Avengers and accepted that the familiar SHIELD agents were friendlies.

It took longer than he wanted to contain the fleeing minions and when he met up with Clint, he could tell immediately that something was wrong.  "Sit-rep," he said.

"Is your comm down?" Clint asked immediately, his finger pressed to his ear.

"Yeah, what do you hear?" Steve asked.

"It's not about the battle, but you're skipping debrief to check on your girl.  JARVIS told Tony that she's been puking her guts out all morning.  For a computer, he's pretty insulted about not having full surveillance access to your floor," Clint said.  "I think she hurt his feelings and Tony wants you to go home to mediate."

"Is she okay?" Steve asked.

"She made JARVIS pout, Steve," Clint said.

"She was throwing up yesterday, too.  Bruce gave her something," Steve said.

"I'll fly you back when we're done with cleanup."

"You just want to get out of debrief," Steve said.  Clint beamed at him.

**what**

"How can this happen?" Maria whispered.  This had to be wrong.  She only had one working ovary, the damage from her first major shootout had ripped away any chance of her having children.

"It is possible, just rare," Bruce replied.

"He uses condoms, he's very strict about it.  He used to do those VD ads."  She sat down and skimmed the results again.

"I haven't told anyone.  If you want to…" Bruce lets his voice fade.

"I couldn't do that without telling him.  We can't have a kid, Bruce, not with our jobs.  If anyone found out that Captain America had a child, it would be a target for the good and bad guys," Maria said.  This couldn't be true.

Bruce slid the chair up to the desk and took her hand in a rare gesture of tactile support.  "You probably won't carry it full term.  Have you had miscarriages before?"

"I'm careful and it's not supposed to be an issue," Maria said.  There was a lot of scar tissue down there.  She couldn't be pregnant.  "Maybe I shouldn't tell him until it's a definite thing.  How definite is this?"

"You'll need further exams, you're still early into your first trimester from your levels.  You're not anemic but your iron's borderline low and you need to see a doctor.  I set you an appointment for this afternoon.  You have to get this checked out," Bruce said urgently.

Steve stepped into the room, sweaty and smeared with grime from the off-base training with the support teams.  His face immediately flashed with worry.  "Hey."

Bruce let go of her hand.

"Thanks, Bruce.  Will you send me the details of that meeting?  I'll fill everyone in after I've met with them," Maria said, the swell of panic in her stomach rising.  Or worse, more morning sickness.  Oh God.  This was never supposed to happen.

"Sure," he said, giving her a significant look as he left her with Steve.

Steve closed the door behind him and immediately turned to her.  "What is it?"

"I can't tell you yet, I need more information.  It doesn't involve the team," she said.

"The team's not asking," Steve replied, his hand warm on her back as he pulled her in for a gentle kiss.  "What's wrong?  You look shaken.  Are you sick?"

"No, God," she whispered, turning her face into his chest and holding on tightly.  "I'm not sick, it's different."

Steve had become her rock and she needed him now more than ever, but she couldn't tell him anything when she wasn't sure.

"Maria," he murmured.  "Tell me."

"I…fuck.  You can't cancel with the General this afternoon…"

"I can for you," Steve said immediately.  "Tony loves riling up the military, he'd take the meeting for me."

"And start another military incident, no thanks," Maria said.  She had to control her emotions.  She couldn't go soft now.  "I got this and I'll fill you in on everything as soon as I have something definite to tell you."

"I don't accept that.  Let's not start keeping secrets."

She didn't want to raise his hopes if a miscarriage was imminent but she couldn't keep this from him either when it was so important.  A child.  Jesus fuck.  "I need you to trust me.  Something like this, it can wait until tonight.  I promise, it's nothing to worry about."

"I do trust you, but you're upset and I don't want you to handle something that upsets you when I should help you.  Is it Rose?"

Maria winced at the mention of her mother's name but she shook her head.  God, her mother would move to New York if the baby came out healthy.  She would lose her mind.

"You're really not going to tell me?" Steve asked, taking her face in his hands.

She pushed herself up on her tiptoes and kissed him.  "Don't worry so much."  He rolled his eyes and pulled her in for a deeper kiss.

**substitute**

Bucky leaned against the wall of the parking lot and picked at his arm.  He was still finding grass and sticks in the joints from his faceplant last week in the Ozarks.  He hated the mountains.

He recognized Maria's familiar steps and straightened his posture.  Steve had told him under no circumstances to let her leave without him.  Steve was worried.  Not end of the world worried, but girlfriend worried.

He'd always wondered growing up how Steve would deal with a girlfriend but considering that was over 70 years ago, and they were in different bodies now – it had turned into a different kind of question.  Steve found Maria on his own, he'd grown the balls to approach her and they fit better than anyone Bucky would have chosen for his best friend.

Maria was Bucky's friend, too.  It drove Natasha nuts, and Steve a little, too, but he credited Maria for getting him out of SHIELD's mad science department relatively unscathed.  She stuck up for him and she was the reason he had an actual life.

"Fuck, did Steve send you?" Maria frowned when she spotted him by her car.

"Got it in one.  What's on the agenda, Boss?" Bucky asked.

"You can't tag along for this, Bucky," Maria said.  Steve was right, there was something haunted behind her eyes.

"Too late," he said, dangling the keys he'd stolen from her bag earlier.  "You gonna tell me the address now or do you want to put it in the GPS?"

"Bucky," she sighed.  "You can't come with me."

"You can't stop me so stop being weird and get in the car.  You're lucky Steve didn't blow off the General, you know nothing winds him up more than worrying about you," Bucky said.

"That's exactly why I didn't tell him," Maria muttered.

Bucky knew now why Steve was worried.  "Let's go, he'll be expecting an update to make sure you haven't gone AWOL on me."

"I'm driving," she said finally, holding out her hand for the keys.

Bucky shrugged and climbed into the car.  "Now that's settled, what's this meeting about?"

Maria pulled onto the street and didn't look at him.  "It's a doctor's appointment."

"Bruce sourced you out?" Bucky asked, surprised.

"He got some of my blood tests back, he's sending me for a consult."

Her knuckles were white on the steering wheel and he held his next question.  She didn't look sick and he sparred with her a couple of times a week and she hadn't seemed sick.  But Steve had been worried when JARVIS ratted her out for throwing up during their op last week.

"He says I'm pregnant.  But I'm not supposed to be able to get pregnant," Maria said finally.

Fuck.  "Accidents happen…" he hesitated.  Steve was going to flip the fuck out.

"My equipment's not in working order.  I'm not supposed to be able to get pregnant," Maria cut him off.  "If it's true, it probably won't make it through the first trimester.  I can't tell him until it's confirmed.  We've never talked about kids because they weren't possible.  I have no idea how to deal with this but I know I can't get him panicked before I know if this is a lab error or a fluke."

"Shit."

She cut her eyes to him.  "Steve would flip."

"Hell yeah, I'm about to flip and you're not even my girl.  Bruce – was he sure?" Bucky asked.

"He said blood doesn't lie but we'll see what this doctor says," Maria said.

"You are going to tell Steve, right?  I mean, we're not going to some back alley abortionist or anything, right?"

"You better be glad you were born in the 20's, asshole."  She lowered her voice.  "I wouldn't do that to Steve.  If I wasn't with Steve, that would be my most likely decision, hell, just for health reasons, but I'm committed to him and that means we decide things together."

"So why aren't you telling him?" Bucky asked.

"Because I don't know enough to tell him anything.  It's only been a couple of hours.  I won't tell him until I know for sure."

Bucky frowned.  "Banner wouldn't have told you if he didn't know for sure."

"It's not for sure," Maria snapped.

He realized that she was really _really_ shaken.  "Why did you think you couldn't get pregnant?"

"I got my insides busted up years ago, it's all scar tissue and staples down there," she muttered absently.

He winced.  "Jesus, Boss, soften it up a little."

She didn't smile, she didn't loosen her grip and Bucky knew he should have shut up blocks ago.

"This'll be a clusterfuck," Maria said suddenly.  "Captain America's kid will be a target as soon as word gets out.  I'll be a liability, the undeniable weakness of the country's trademark superhero.  And God help me, even if I swell up and die popping out that kid, I would never take fatherhood from him if he wanted it."

He reached over when she pulled into a parking space with a screech of brakes.  He took one of her wrists in his metal fingers.  "Hey.  None of that's going to happen.  At least not on my watch, okay?  You're going to march in there, spread your legs and cough and then the doc's going to answer all these questions."

"Shut up, Bucky," Maria sighed.

He squeezed her wrist gently.  "You're like a sister to me, Maria.  I'm going to support you the only way I know how."

"Sitting in the waiting room and keeping your mouth shut?" Maria asked.

Bucky winked.  "You got half that right."

**red alarm**

_She's home.  Come down.  Dont bring anyone else._

Steve was on the elevator before he finished reading the text and Bucky met him at the doors.  "What happened?"

"She hasn't told me, she has to tell you.  But I'm staying," Bucky said with an expression he couldn't read.  This wasn't good.  If Bucky was closed off to Steve then something had to be up with Maria or Natasha.  They were the only people Bucky would protect with the same fervor as he did Steve himself.

"Where?  Is she hurt?" Steve asked.

Bucky nodded his head to the living room where Maria was standing by the window looking out over the city.

"Hey, what's going on?" Steve asked immediately, turning her around to embrace her.  He hoped she couldn't hear how fast his heart was beating.

She meant too much to him and she seemed...scared.  He could feel her tremors with each breath.  "Hey," he repeated, softer.  Maria didn't do scared.

"It probably won't stick.  She said that it shouldn't be possible at all, my insides are scarred all to hell."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Steve replied when she didn't continue.

"Five weeks.  It's been in there five weeks and my body hasn't rejected it yet but it probably won't stick.  High risk, probably bedrest, new diet, it won't stick," Maria whispered.

It hit him like a sniper's bullet through his spine.  "Maria - are you - "

"We always use condoms, and I'm not supposed to be able to get pregnant - but - goddamn it, what are we going to do?" Maria blurted out.

He couldn't breathe so he pulled her closer, wrapping as much of his body around her as he could.  "Oh my God.  You're pregnant?  I...I love you, Maria, but wow...a _baby_?"

A baby?  He was going to be a father?

He replayed her words in his head and pulled back to look in her eyes.  "High risk?  Start at the beginning - tell me everything - Bucky, get out," he added, turning to his best friend.

"Nope, not until she spills the whole story - I'll keep everyone off your back, full 24 hours, if she comes clean about what the doc said," Bucky said, stubbornly.  "I need to know, too."

"Why is he worried?" Steve asked Maria.  Her face shuttered closed but at least she was steadier on her feet.

"There's a 75% chance I'll lose it before I hit 12 weeks.  But she said that I'm healthy and there's nothing they can do to predict it this early," Maria said.

"But if you don't lose it, will you be okay?" Bucky asked.  Steve glanced at him sharply.

"They won't know until I'm further along, but they'll plan a C-section, schedule it like they do for rich people," Maria said.

Steve took both her hands and made her look at him.  "If a decision has to be made, I don't want to lose you, can we just cross that off the discussion?"

He meant it.  God, he'd never imagined himself having kids after the serum – he gave that up when he took up the shield.  He never thought he'd have a woman he loved like Maria either, but he wasn't willing to let that go for a child he'd never met.  A child they wouldn't know what to do with. 

"Doc says if I make it past 12 weeks that they can take precautions.  Things are different now than when the marine medics gave me the diagnosis years ago," Maria said.

Something warm flared in his chest.  A baby.  They might have a baby.

"Good," Bucky interrupted.  "I'm going to fill Bruce in and make sure your floor's locked down from interruptions."  He caught Steve's eyes to make sure he was okay before heading out.

"You shouldn't have sent him with me," Maria said.

"You're right, you should have taken _me_ with you," Steve replied.  He was hurt that she hadn't told him right away.

"I had to know for sure.  I don't bring missions to the team until I know the whole story and I couldn't bring this to you until I knew for sure.  You can't be mad that I waited four hours for confirmation," Maria said, pulling her hands away and crossing her arms defiantly.

"I'm not mad, but I don't like when you keep things from me, especially things concerning your health," Steve said.

"Goddamnit, this isn't about my health, this is about your child – "

"Our child – and it is about your health, obviously, since you and Bucky are freaking out and you're the one who has to carry the baby, if you want to – "

"Motherfuck," Maria snapped.  "We aren't going to fight about this right now."

"Okay, then let's _talk_ about it instead," Steve said.  A baby - God, babies were gifts, always miracles, but Maria - she was everything to him.

He reached out and pulled her into his arms, sinking down to the couch with her in his lap.  He kissed her, fiercely, until she relaxed against him.

"Talk," Steve whispered.  "It's just you and me, not an army or monsters, just us."

She sighed, straddling him and putting her arms over his shoulders loosely so they were face to face, connected.  "Us."

He smoothed his hands down the line of her back, settling on her waist.  He wanted to put his hands over her stomach, to bond with the tiny burst of life inside; but they had to talk about this.

"I don't want kids.  I've never wanted kids.  But God help me, I'll have yours if you want it."

"You can't...make this all about me, we're talking about us," Steve whispered.  "This baby, it's ours.  If you don't want to be a mother...it's not something you can fake."

"Do you think I could be a mother?"  She leaned her forehead against his.  "Do you think we could be parents and still be...us?"

"You mean Captain America and Assistant Director Hill?"

"I'm not the Assistant Director anymore."

"And I'm not Captain America right now," he said, tilting her chin up for a kiss.  "I'm Steve and you're Maria.  I love you like crazy and there's nothing I wouldn't do for you."

"I don't want you to get your hopes up," she amended.  "I don't know how to be a mother, but I don't want to waste what's probably the only shot I'll get."

"Us.  It's our baby.  And we'll have 9 months to get it figured out," Steve said, taking her hands and holding them under his own across her stomach.  "We have to be all in.  Together."

"Yeah.  Okay.  We can do it, I guess.  Ride it out, see where it takes us," Maria said, shakily.  He kissed her and she melted against him.

"I love you.  Say it back," he said, putting his hands on her ass and pulling her against him.

"I love you," she laughed, familiar with the rapport because they said it to each other at least once a day.

"As long as we keep meaning it, I think we're going to do just fine," Steve said.

**questions**

"So, when do you want to get married?" Steve asked when they'd relocated to the floor and she was curled around his side tracing his ribs.

His body was magnificent and she was still stunned every time she remembered he was all hers.  The words took a moment to process.  "What?"

He pushed her hair back and cupped her cheek with his big hand.  "Not just because you're pregnant, I've had the ring for a while but you get kind of…prickly about things like that."

"Captain America can't," she started carefully, but he turned his gaze away and she knew she'd broken one of their base rules.  "Sorry.  Wait – you already have a ring?"

He blushed and she felt her stomach flip like the first time when he stammered out the invitation to their first date.  "Yeah.  It never seemed like a good time to ask and I'm not worried about you leaving me.  I might be old-fashioned, but I'm trying and, well, I was going to ask and we said we were going all in, right?"

It was hard for her to say no to Steve on a normal day, off the field anyway, they still bartered over mission plans on a daily basis; but this time, she wasn't even sure she wanted to say no at all.

"I possibly asked Fury for permission months ago and he has a whole thing arranged for paperwork purposes," Steve said under his breath.

She sat up.  "You what?"

"Well, I wasn't going to ask your mother yet, and you've already brought up Captain America's reputation twice in the past hour so there had to be a plan, for paperwork at least," Steve said, pouting.  "Captain America isn't getting married, Steve Rogers is.  If he has a woman that wants to."

She rolled her eyes and punched him in the arm.  "You can't ask without showing me the ring.  I can't believe you asked Fury for permission."

She shouldn't be surprised that Steve knew how close she and Nick were behind their carefully structured walls.  They'd worked together a long time and they shared a lot of losses.

"He threatened me, _thoroughly_.  Hell, if he finds out I knocked you up before I asked, he'll probably kill me for real," Steve said.  He put his hands on her stomach.  "Can I be excited now?"

"Yeah," she decided.  After their 'meeting', she didn't have the same burn of panic in her chest.  "As long as you don't go all overprotective papa bear on me."

He avoided her eyes but didn't move his hands from her belly.  "You said you have to be careful and considering the way Bucky was glaring at you, I can't trust that you're telling me the whole story about your health."  He lowered his voice.  "You're too important to me to risk."

"Our life is built on risks.  I haven't been into the field in weeks as is," Maria said, hoping it didn't sound like a whine.

"We're going to fight about this later, I'm sure, once I talk to Bruce about what exactly a high-risk pregnancy entails, but I don't want you on a plane or the Helicarrier or anywhere near combat," Steve said.  "Even if we have to disappear on an extended honeymoon for 9 months, I'll do whatever it takes."

He rolled over and blanketed his body over hers, bracing himself above her with his arms.  She was glad they hadn't cleaned up yet because he knew all her buttons by now.  "I almost lost you last year.  I don't want to go through that again."

"I almost lose you twice a week, Rogers," Maria said.  Danger was the reason the Avengers existed - preventing it was their purpose.

"Not the same and you know it," he said, leaning in for a kiss.  "I'm not in the mood to fight, but don't be surprised when I bring it up again."

"I'm not some kind of…"

"Have I ever treated you like anything other than a soldier?  We've been together too long for you to even think that.  You're competent and amazing, but you're also my girl.  And maybe the mother of my kid," Steve said.  "You can't fight me on this because I'll have too much backup once you tell your mother."

"Nope," Maria said, tableing the argument for later.  She needed to know more, too, now that she was definitely carrying this baby.  Steve might not be distracted when his competent soldier girlfriend was in the field with them now, but would be completely compromised if his pregnant wife was anywhere near the line of fire.  "I'll tell Fury, but you're telling my mother.  Now go find that ring so I can at least have something shiny to reward me for this day."

Steve grinned blindingly at her and she knew she was fucked.  This was not in her life plan, not even her recently revised life plan but she'd reconstructed her plan once already and she could do it again.

A baby.  Where would a baby even fit into their already insane lives?

She lost her breath when Steve rejoined her on the floor, crouching down on both knees.  There was a small wooden box in his hands.

His cheeks were flushed and she knew he was nervous despite the levity of their banter.  "Will you marry me, Maria?"

She wrapped her arms around him.  "I love you, idiot.  Say it back."

"Idiot," he laughed into her hair.

**conference**

Tony nodded his chin in Steve's general direction when he stepped into the common lounge.  Pepper smiled at him and greeted him with actual words.

It was rare to see the couple relaxing together without some kind of work in their hands but Tony was fully focused on the cartoon onscreen with Pepper's feet in his lap and she looked like she was about to purr from his distracted massage.

"You're up late, Bucky said you and Maria were taking some private time," Pepper said.

"I hope I'm not interrupting _your_ private time," Steve said but he knew JARVIS would have warned him if they were indisposed.

"We haven't gotten that far yet, Tony's been 'researching' with Bruce all afternoon," Pepper said with a fond smile.

"Seriously.  It's a milkshake, a box of fries and a meatball - what - oh.  Hey, Cap," Tony blinked with a lazy smile.

"Hey, Tony," Steve smiled.  He sat on his hands, unsure if he was still shaking.  Maria had retreated to their room to inform Fury (and hopefully her mother, about the wedding at least) and the shock was setting in.  He had to tell someone and Bucky was locked down with Natasha and he wasn't going to bother them, not yet.  It was well after midnight and he expected Tony and Pepper to be awake.

"What's on your mind, Steve?" Pepper interrupted his thoughts.  "Everything okay?"

"Um.  I don't know where to start," Steve hesitated.

Tony paused the TV, his face darkening with worry.

"None of it's bad.  It's...really good.  I think.  It's also really fucking scary," Steve huffed out.  "So you know..."

"Did you finally ask Maria to marry you?" Pepper asked, blooming into a grin.

"Well, yes, but..."

"Wait - you knew he was going to propose?" Tony asked.

"I helped him get the ring sized," Pepper preened.  She refocused on him.  "Congratulations, honey, that's great..."

"And she's pregnant," Steve said before she could go on.

Tony glanced between them.  "Did you know that?" he asked Pepper.

"It was an accident.  I mean, condoms break sometimes, but Maria, she didn't think she could conceive.  She says it's a high risk pregnancy - do you know what that means?" Steve asked.

Pepper's eyes flashed but she smiled warmly.  "Lots of women are considered high risk, Steve, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.  She'll just need closer monitoring than normal pregnancies."

"How high risk?" Tony asked quietly.

"I'm going with her to the doctor next time.  She didn't tell me until after she'd found out for sure."

"Steve?" Tony urged.

"She might lose it.  She's only 5 weeks along and she says she wants to make it to 12 before we tell anyone..." He shuddered and had to close his eyes a moment.  "But we're good at walking into things without knowing what the hell we're doing, so we're going to go for it."

"We'll lock her in a bubble," Tony stated with dark eyes.  "Goddamn, Cap, you're having a kid - "

"Don't get any ideas," Pepper elbowed him, turning back to Steve.  "What can we do?"

"Is Bruce on top of this?" Tony interrupted.  "We'll get her consults with the best doctors..."

"Bruce found in on her checkup," Steve said.  "He's the one that made her go to the doctor.  He told me it was a 'meeting' and we have to talk about that, but I haven't seen him since she told me.  I knew something was up so I sent Bucky but he didn't go inside and Maria told him less than she told me.  I think she's scared and I don't know enough about it to know what to say."

"Babies are scary," Tony agreed.

Pepper gave him a look and reached over to pat Steve's hand.  "It's different for women.  For the next nine months, she's going to be responsible for this baby and with her job, it's going to be a bigger adjustment than leaving SHIELD, and it's only the beginning because when the nine months are up, there's a child she'll be taking care of for 18 years."

"We'll have a child to take care of together," Steve corrected.  "I think that's why I'm so worried - I can't help her now and what if it's dangerous?"

"Medicine's come a long way in 70 years, Cap," Tony said.  "We'll get her the best care we can buy."

He sighed, hoping his friends knew how grateful he was to have them on his side.  "Okay.  I don't know enough to talk about that anymore.  So.  Weddings?"

"Do I need to duel Bucky for best man status?" Tony asked.

Steve hadn't gotten that far.  "Um."

"God, am I going to have to duel Natasha for godmother?" Pepper asked, her eyes going wide.

Maybe he should have gotten more of a plan together before coming upstairs.  "I need help with the basics first.  We're doing it small, private, but we'll still want it to be nice.  I mean, you know Maria's mother will want a nice wedding," Steve said.

"Of course, what do you guys have in mind?" Pepper asked.

"Can we use the Tower's ballroom?  That way it'll be inside and we can make sure it's private," Steve said.  "JARVIS can film it for us and we were thinking about doing it at night with fewer civilians in the building.  We haven't had time to talk about it much but...she's talking to her mom and I needed to tell someone."

"Steve," Tony said softly.  "You deserve to be happy."

"I am...God, I'm so happy, I just don't know if I'm supposed to be when the baby..." Steve finally admitted.  "I want to tell everyone, I want to just...enjoy this.  She really liked the ring, and I think she's happy, too..."

Pepper snorted.  "Cap, I promise, she's happy.  The way she looks at you - there's no doubt in my mind that she's ecstatic."

Steve sighed, letting himself relax with his friends' support.  "We're going to tell everyone soon but I think we need to let it sink in ourselves first.  We're not telling her mom about the baby until she's through the first trimester but we're telling the team."

"We'll make sure she's safe, Steve.  She's one of ours," Tony said, catching his eyes.

Pepper glanced between them and rolled her eyes.  She knew firsthand how protective the Avengers as a whole could be when one of 'their own' was threatened.  She had a flat tire once in LA and Barton had flown a quinjet across the country to check it for sabotage when JARVIS ratted her out.  "She's not a fan of being coddled."

"Yeah, but this is different.  I think she knows this is different," Steve said.  "I'm going to make sure she knows."

**backwash**

Natasha watched Bucky from the corner of her eye, searching for a slip.  He was acting strangely, oddly sweet and she wasn't sure how to deal with it.  She wasn't a cuddler but he liked contact and she still felt special every time he touched her.

She couldn't call it love, that would make it something someone could take from her; but she was growing to actually need him in her life.  She didn't want that to be upset by Bucky's current weirdness.

Steve was talking with Fury at the head of the table and Maria was tapping her fingers absently, flashing the ring Natasha refused to be the first to ask about.

"Can we get this meeting started so we'll get to the Q & A faster?" Clint said finally.

Fury cleared his throat.  Maria pushed the chair back and walked out of the room.  She wasn't the only one that heard the retching.

"You knocked her up, congratulations, Cap!" Clint grinned suddenly.

Steve smiled shyly, flushing and she knew it was true.  She raised an eyebrow in Bucky's direction.

"Thank God, it was killing me to keep it a secret," Bucky said, throwing up his hands.

"As of now, Maria will be on light duty as liaison with SHIELD.  If she's unavailable to call the plays, one of you will have to take a turn in the liaison chair, which means working with SHIELD directly," Fury said.

"I'll probably take that chair for low grade emergencies," Steve said.

So he could be close to Maria.  Of course.

She wondered how compromised was too compromised.

A child was a weakness.  They were dangerous.  Too fragile for the hands of a killer.  They were precious and if anyone deserved a family, it was Steve Rogers.  He'd come so far from the lost out-of-place boy from the past.

Steve was good for them all and Maria was good for him.

"We can handle that," Tony said.  "We've been doing well lately, I'm sure we can pull it together to welcome a little mini-Cap."

"In other news, Maria has to take it easy and I think we all remember how hard that was when she was off her feet last year," Bruce interjected.

"We're getting married, there's that, too," Steve smiled.

"Finally, you've been sitting on that ring for months," Bucky laughed.

"You guys are more than my teammates, you're my friends and my family of choice," Steve said.  "I hope you guys can be as happy as I am."

"We're going to spoil the hell out of that kid, Cap, good on you," Clint said.  He had a bright, genuine, smile on his face and she hadn't seen that since they lost Coulson.

"Congratulations, Steve," she said finally.  "I politely request to be left off diaper duty."

"Oh, me too," Bucky said immediately.

Fury murmured something in Steve's ear and nodded his gruff goodbyes.

"We don't know if the pregnancy is going to work out," Steve said hesitantly.  "The chances are high that she'll miscarry so...we're keeping that on the backburner until the twelve week mark.  We're going to take preparations slow in case...it case it doesn't stick."

Natasha found herself holding her breath.  She couldn't imagine getting the gift of a child only to lose it before she got to hold it. 

Maria stepped in, pale but steady.  "I don't need to be treated like glass, I still intend on pulling my weight around here," she said.

" _But_ ," Steve interrupted.

Maria sighed.  "But you all have permission to ask me to tag out if you see me fading."

Steve smiled.  Maria turned and rushed out of the room again.

"Is she okay?" Tony asked.

"Morning sickness hit her pretty hard last night," Bruce answered.

"Is that okay for the child?" Natasha asked.  God, she was already invested.

"She feels better after," Steve said.  "She says its okay and I've learned to pick my battles."

Natasha didn't want to be a mother, but since her defection from the Red Room and her initiation into the Avengers, she had been trying to learn how to be a friend.  She wanted one of them to have a family and she was already part of Steve's.

"It might be interesting to be an aunt," Natasha decided.

**safety gates**

"What are we doing, Stark?" Maria asked, holding her arms out as he zipped up the stretchy fabric around her torso over her tank top.

"This is a fabric Reed came up with, it molds around your body so it's not putting pressure on your tiny passenger but it's also shock resistant, radiation shielded and bulletproof," Tony said, stepping back to examine his work.

It was snug, but not tight or heavy.  "Why isn't he mass producing this stuff?"

"It's really hard to make but I bankrolled him for it so he doesn't have to declare bankruptcy again," Tony said absently.  "Susan wants an invite to the wedding, Torch spilled the beans already."

"Ugh, she's so smart.  And _pretty_ ," Maria hissed, testing the fabric.

" _Meow_ , Maria," Tony snorted.

"And _nice_ , God, she sucks," Maria frowned.  It wasn't just because Steve adored the woman.

"I could kill her if you want," Natasha announced, walking into the room with two yoga mats under her arm.

"I want to get a better zipper, so you don't set off medal detectors.  Be right back," Tony said, chattering to himself as he headed out for supplies.

"Are you here to make me try on clothes, too?" Maria asked.

"No.  I support your new situation," Natasha said.  "I did some research, ran an op as a physical therapist for a few months in '02.  Since you're not going to be able to spar or exercise normally, I thought I could show you some low impact exercises."

Maria's touched.  "Thanks.  Bruce is going to help me with meditation, for my stress level."

"These have a lot of elements of yoga so they should work well together," Natasha said.

She didn't expect Natasha to openly pitch in to help with her 'new situation' but she appreciated another female on her side along with Pepper.  And apparently Susan Storm.

"I never thought a husband and a kid would be something I would want.  But I really want this to work out," Maria admitted.

"Me, too.  I don't know much about functional families, but I think you and Cap could have one.  It's nice to have excitement that doesn't come with violence," Natasha replied thoughtfully.  "Bucky's an old fashioned kind of guy."

"God, don't tell me Barnes is courting you," Tony said, reappearing with a new zipper and a glue gun.

"I'm not sure," Natasha replied, spreading the yoga mats on the floor.  "He brought me flowers yesterday.  He's been very...cuddly lately."

"That's so disturbing, let's talk about something else," Tony frowned.

**redemption song**

"Close the door," Fury said.

They were working so he didn't bother giving Natasha a questioning look.  He closed the door and moved to stand at her side.  He found himself standing at attention and Natasha flicked her gaze at him but Bucky had shadowed Maria enough before her 'resignation' to know Director Fury would appreciate the gesture.  He hoped anyway.  He had a lot of amends to make and SHIELD had the experience with brainwashed assassins that Steve might not have access to if the time came.

"I'm taking the noise buffers to mean this isn't a team mission?" Natasha asked finally as Fury flicked several switches in his desk drawer.

"It's a highly sensitive mission.  I need it off the books.  I need Barnes because he's the only person skilled enough to handle this without being compromised.  The rest of your team  - including you, Romanoff - are compromised.  Hell, I'm compromised - but this - we have to take immediate action," Fury said, holding Bucky's gaze with his good eye.

Fuck, this was serious if the Director was giving Bucky the lead.

"Sir?" Natasha spoke, her eyes narrowed.

"This was not supposed to land on my desk," Fury said, opening a black folder and revealing a photo of a balding man in Bermuda shorts standing over a bleeding businessman.

Natasha gasped and reached out, digging her fingers into his arm hard enough to bruise.

"I was there when they zipped up the body bag.  I want to know how the fuck this happened but you know what order the Council is going to bring down," Fury said.  He clenched his fists and Bucky put his hand on Natasha's back to steady her and approach the desk for a closer look.

"Phil," Natasha whispered.  "Are you sure?"

"Clint's 'Phil'?  I thought...oh.  Oh," Bucky realized.  All of his friends talked about Coulson.

"We don't talk about that," Natasha whispered.  She stiffened suddenly and met Fury's eye.  "Where is he?"

"I have coordinates but that's all my little bird left for me," Fury said darkly.  "Find out if that's really Phil Coulson, and even if it's an LMD or a clone, I want to see him before SHIELD gets near him."

Bucky closed the file and tucked it into his jacket.

"You take whatever means necessary to get him here alive.  Romanoff.  Are you..." Fury started.

"She'll be fine, she knows the stakes," Bucky said so Natasha didn't have to bristle.  She was vibrating with tension and he didn't like the intent brewing behind her lashes.

"I'll take the heat after, but I can't know anything about this," Fury said.

"Understood, sir," Bucky said.  He guided Natasha into the hallway.  "Hey, you cool?"

"Yeah," she whispered.  "Actually, no."

"Look, Maria's still puking 23 hours a day and Thor's in town to back up Cap and Tony.  We can get a flight, get a tan and get your mentor back."  He stroked her cheek with his metal fingers and she finally met his gaze.  "Let's go play heroes the way we know best."

"Not often we get to use our specialized skills as Avengers."

"Yeah, let's go get Barton's boy back," Bucky said.


	2. Chapter 2

 

  
_Time never had a chance to heal your heart_   
_Just a number always counting down to a new start_   
_If you always knew the truth_   
_Then the world would spin around you_   
_Are you dizzy yet?_

  
**lemonade**  
  
Steve blinked awake and stretched his arm across the bed and found the expected warm spot.  The familiar retching from the slightly cracked bathroom door let him know where Maria had disappeared to.  
  
He wondered if they'd made the wrong choice every day that she spent on her knees huddled in the Tower's bathrooms.  
  
He could hear JARVIS speaking softly to her and the click as their relocated coffeemaker started a slow brew of Bruce's tea, the only thing that she could keep down before noon.  
  
She was so sick.  Steve didn't realize that it would make her this sick.  
  
He waited while she brushed her teeth and splashed water on her face before she walked out and smiled tiredly at him.  "Should've known you were awake."  
  
"I always know when you leave," Steve said.  He didn't ask if she was okay, he knew how she would answer.  
  
"Have you heard anything from Bucky or Natasha?" Maria asked, lying down beside him turning to face him on the pillow.  
  
"I didn't think we talked about work in bed," Steve replied.  
  
She rolled her eyes.  "I'm always in bed lately, and not in the sexy kind of way I'd like."  
  
He leaned in for a kiss.  "Minty.  But no, they're still on a mission and we both know you're Bucky's point of contact."  He wasn't jealous of the two of them anymore but it was strange sometimes that his girl was his best friend's touchstone.  
  
"I don't think I could handle both of you hovering.  It's easier when it's just you.  But he's team and family and I'd like to know what kind of op he's on without my approval," Maria admitted.  
  
"I'll check with Fury again," Steve said.  "But I'm sure they're fine.  They can handle themselves and while the Avengers don't specialize in undercover - they do, so I'm sure there's a reason they're involved and we're not."  
  
"Okay.  Now that we've exhausted that avenue of distraction, you have to find another way to distract me," Maria said, sliding her hand under the sheets.  "You should brush your teeth first.  But don't shave yet," she smiled, scrubbing her hand across his chin.  
  
"I'd have a full beard if you had your wicked way," Steve laughed, stealing a kiss before morning prep.  
  
If her libido was the only perk of her pregnancy so far, he was going to enjoy it to the fullest.  
  
 **evolution**  
  
"Look at that guy, he has an actual handlebar mustache.  I wonder if he has to special order mustache styling gel," Bucky murmured.  
  
"Is that worth calling off radio silence?" Natasha said in his ear.  
  
"Nothing wrong with killing time if we don't have anything else to kill," Bucky replied.  
  
"I don't know if something's fucked in my memory, but working with you in the past was much different."  
  
"You worked with James, not Bucky," he said.  He was both, once, now he was a mix of the two.  Or something.  He was finally settling into his own skin and his own mind.  
  
"I'm becoming aware of that.  We haven't had to rely on SHIELD intel yet.  We're ahead of them and I'm still trying to figure out how you managed that."  
  
"You were doubting me?  Wow, I had no idea," Bucky said dryly.  "I know how to do everything James can do, I just choose what knowledge to use now."  
  
Deep down, he wondered why Natasha stayed with him.  If she would always search for The Winter Soldier like Steve did for Bucky when he thought he wasn't looking.  
  
James craved her.  Sometimes when Bucky would kiss her, mapping her mouth with his tongue, he could feel a part deep inside of him twisting, desperate and dying as Bucky took the only real thing that mattered to The Winter Soldier and tried to make it his own.  
  
She looked at him like he was a puzzle, trying to figure out which pieces were missing.  Trying to figure out if his mismatched pieces made a complete picture or a mess of shapes and color.  Bucky knew she would never be truly his, she would always have James first in her heart when she looked at him.  
  
Steve would do anything to get his best friend back, and Natasha would do the same if there was a chance of James returning non-homicidal.  Bucky didn't want to lose himself fully to either one.  He wanted them to be able to love the man he was now, not the men he'd been before.  
  
"Bucky.  Sit-rep?"  
  
"Scanner matched No-Beard's biometrics inside so he's on site and secure."  
  
"Then what are we waiting for?" Natasha snapped.  
  
"We need to wait until his handler shows up.  Then we can get him between missions and find out his next mark in one rush.  Stand down," Bucky replied evenly.  "I've got a distraction lined up to thin out the civvies when its time and six cars stashed for exit."  
  
"I'm always going to doubt you, Barnes, it's in my job description."  
  
"And you're doing a great job," Bucky said under his breath.  He lined up his scope with their mystery guest as he turned the corner.  The bouncer was a shitty gambler and Bucky had a gift at calling cockfights and he hit 'send' on his phone and saw the man's taciturn nod.  
  
"Make it rain, Lita," Bucky grinned when he saw the lighting change through the windows of the club.  
  
"Barnes?"  
  
The man reached the door and the bouncer scanned him and moved him aside to allow a cluster of girls inside.  Bucky squeezed the trigger and the man didn't have a chance to fall before the bouncer caught him and smoothly lowered him to the ground, placing a small sign that said 'Drunks not allowed entry' on his chest.  These tranq darts were no joke.    
  
He disassembled his rifle and was down the ladder before he spoke.  "There's a drunk you need to get into the red Volvo idling on the street.  Get him in the backseat and meet me at the south entry in ten minutes."  
  
"You could've told me that earlier," Natasha hissed.  
  
"You don't follow my instructions anyway.  You haven't been in position since I told you about the biometrics.  Get the handler and follow your orders," Bucky said, letting his voice drop into James to get her head back in the game.  
  
He put a lot of work into this op and there were a lot of things he hadn't told Natasha, simply because she was completely blinded to anything other than getting her mentor out.  
  
Bucky found the guy in their first week but he'd sent Natasha on recon instead of snatching the guy out of his routine.  It had been a month and he'd managed to slip hints of the Original No-Beard into the guy's daily life.  An arrow in a tropical drink instead of an umbrella.  Decorative pictures in his motel rooms of the Mediterranean where he and Clint spent a week as 'hostages' at a nude beach.  Winnie the Pooh plush toys in every restaurant lobby.  Zane Grey paperbacks instead of magazines in every public bathroom.  
  
The only thing that he could tell from his surveillance that had an effect was the cards.  Snitched out of Clint's hidden stash of mementos, he left a Captain America trading card at every stop.  He knew No-Beard had them in his things.  
  
It was finally time for Bucky to meet the man that meant so much to the people that mattered most to him.  
  
There was a stuffed hawk perched above the bar and the man was staring up at it unblinking.  Money was still falling from the ceiling in the dance hall and the bar was mostly deserted apart from the bartender and a couple of waitresses.  He winked at the blonde and she rolled her eyes and swiveled her hips when she went to keep watch by the staff exit.  
  
"There you are, Babes, been looking all over town," Bucky said, using Barton's pet name for him as he clamped his metal hand down on the mark's wrist and turned him into a kiss so he could push the tranquilizer tab into his mouth.  No-Beard grunted and pushed him away but the fight was already draining out of him.  
  
Bucky turned to the bartender and paid the tab with the man previously known as Phil Coulson draped around his shoulders.  The bartender tossed him a pirate's hat and he secured it on No-Beard's head.  "There you go, Babes, it's a pirate's life for you."  
  
 **stutter**  
  
Maria blinked up with Tony entirely too close to her face.  "Personal space violation, Stark," she said.  
  
"Thank fuck," Tony said.  "How do you feel?"  
  
She blinked again and recognized the ceiling of her living room.  "Dizzy.  What happened?"  
  
"JARVIS called me, I was closest.  Happy's sending up the paramedics, JARVIS still doesn't have visual surveillance in here, just health monitoring, did you hit your head?  How many fingers am I holding up?"  
  
Her hands immediately went to her abdomen but she felt fine apart from her wavering vision.  "Your hands are on my shoulders, Tony.  Help me up..."  
  
"No, just stay down until the medics get here, we have protocol for this, no sudden movements," Tony said, barely controlling his panic.  It reminded her that she was okay and she needed to keep everything calm.  
  
"I'm just lightheaded.  Do you have protocol on not interrupting Steve when he's on an op?" Maria asked.  
  
"JARVIS has the ranking, it depends on the op and he's not calling since you're awake and cognizant, right, J?" Tony asked the invisible AI.  
  
"Her blood pressure has reached a satisfactory level, Sir.  Captain Rogers will not be informed until his next check-in pending further medical testing," JARVIS replied.  
  
"You're not going to argue about the EMTs?" Tony asked, slowly helping her sit up.  
  
"It's not just about me anymore," Maria said.  "It's been 11 weeks.  It's real now, it's..."  
  
"It's fine, I'm sure it was just a fluke," Tony said, putting his hands over hers.  "And I'm politely not going to mention that you have a potbelly."  
  
"Thanks," Maria snorted.  "I haven't done anything differently and I'm barely working as it is."  
  
"According to Bruce's regularly updated flow charts, you're fine, you probably just stood up too fast, we'll check it out, well, not me, but professionals," Tony said.  
  
Happy led in a couple of paramedics and she was politely manhandled to the couch and attached to a blood pressure cuff and oxygen mask.  
  
"Bruce is en route, he was close enough to get the call, too," Tony said, stepping into his vision and holding up his phone.  
  
"Yet again, I'm a fan of following protocols," Maria said as her vision cleared.  "Thanks."  
  
Once the medics had cleared her and Bruce had declared her iron-deficient and stuck on even lighter duty until her levels came up; she knew it was time for the Phone Call of Doom.  
  
She was going to have this baby.  She hadn't come this far to lose it, not now.  It was real now.  
  
Her mother answered on the second ring.  "Maria?  You better be calling with more wedding plans, it's been a week since you gave me an update."  
  
"Sorry.  This is something else.  I'm not supposed to tell you yet, I have another week before I'm supposed to tell you.  And I'll deny it if you ever repeat it, but I could really use my Mom right now."  
  
Rose was silent.  "Are you all right?"  
  
"That's a matter of opinion.  And it's not really about me anymore."  She took a deep breath.  "I wanted to make it through the first trimester before I told you, I didn't want to get your hopes up.  Get my hopes up.  But it's been 11 weeks and I just...I think it's real now."  
  
"Oh, honey..."  
  
"Can you come visit?"  Two years ago, she rarely spoke to her mother outside of holiday phone calls but being with Steve had changed her ideas on a lot of things.  It made her appreciate that she had a mother that actually cared about her, no matter their personality conflicts.  
  
"I'm already searching for flights."  
  
"I'm so close to 12 weeks but I passed out today, Bruce says I'm iron-deficient."  
  
"That's nothing to worry about, baby, I went through that with all five of my pregnancies."  
  
It was amazing how much those words calmed her down.  "I don't know how to do this.  Steve and I don't know what we're doing and that's scary as hell."  
  
"Please don't tell me he's marrying you because you're pregnant."  
  
She smiled.  "He had the ring already, he just hadn't asked yet.  He says he was working up to calling and asking you for permission, the loser.  He actually went to Nick."  She looked down at the sparkling diamond on her hand.  "Steve's a sucker for traditions.  My ring was Nick's grandmother's ring."  
  
Rose laughed softly.  "That man has always treated you like one of his cubs."  
  
"Every week we get one thing for the nursery.  We wanted to be sure.  God, Steve's taking furniture classes so he can make a crib, he says everything from the baby stores are too impersonal."  She leaned back against the pillows on the bed.  "I'm supposed to ask if you have anything from my childhood that you want to contribute.  We want this kid to have a family and even if its going to be raised in a house full of superheroes, we want it to know it's loved."  
  
"I'm warning you now that I'm going to hug you when I get to the Tower.  Where is your sappy fiancé?"  
  
"He's on a mission, he'll be back in a day or so," Maria said.  "Tony and Bruce are here, they won't admit it, but I'm pretty sure Steve and JARVIS has everyone on a rotation.  They aren't letting me do anything.  I've been too sick to argue."  
  
"At least they're looking after you.  But you're surrounded by soldiers, spies and superheroes, not parents.  I'm still convinced Barton was born in a cabbage patch, there's no excuse for his manners."  
  
"Mom.  You need to be nice."  
  
"I'm always nice.  See if Louie and Dewie can pick me up from the airport, I like them."  
  
She rolled her eyes.  "Just because they're scared of you."  
  
"They do what I say which is more than I can say for your other guards."  
  
"They're not my guards, they work for Stark."  
  
"They're good boys," Rose said.  "I'll see you soon, honey.  I'm so goddamn happy for you."  
  
"Don't be too happy until my 12 week checkup," Maria said.  
  
"Bullshit.  You've come this far, we'll get that kid out of you before you know it."  
  
 **reality check**  
  
Steve closed the door behind him, grateful to be home.  He hated the snow but the latest missions were making him hate the desert almost as much.  
  
He zeroed in on the IV bag hanging from the edge of the couch.  "Maria?"  
  
She raised her hand above the back and beckoned him over.  
  
"What happened?" Steve asked.  No one had called him.  
  
She looked - wow - _better_ than when he'd left her despite the IV in her arm.  Her cheeks were rosy and her eyes were brighter.  "Hey.  It was only a level two on JARVIS' protocol so he wasn't obligated to tell you.  My iron level's low," she explained.  
  
He searched his memory for the protocol ratings.  "You fainted?"  
  
"Yeah, but I went down easy and Tony got here in record time.  I was only out a few minutes," she said, tugging his hand so he would sit down beside her on the couch.  "I'm not complaining because I feel a lot better after the iron infusion."  She raised the tube.  "This is saline for dehydration."  
  
"Oh baby," Steve whispered, pulling her close.  He should have been here.  
  
"It's fine.  My mom's coming, though.  She said she had the same deficiencies when she was pregnant so I'm not freaking out anymore and you shouldn't either."  
  
"How'd she take it?" Steve asked.  
  
"She's excited.  She's not worried at all, she's so excited," Maria smiled.  "She made me feel better."  
  
"You're going so soft," Steve laughed softly, kissing her forehead.  "You're beautiful."  
  
"You say that before I get fat," she said.  
  
"I'm actually okay with being a chubby chaser, I'm going to embrace it," Steve said, earning a surprised laugh.  
  
"You've been spending too much time with Barton."  
  
"I should have been here," he said.  He should have been here  
  
"I'll need you here more after this thing comes out of me, this was nothing to worry about," she insisted, bunching his shirt in her fingers so he wouldn't pull away.  
  
"You're hooked up to an IV..."  
  
"And I'm going to be okay.  Tomorrow we're having an ultrasound and we'll know for sure that this kid is growing on schedule," Maria said.  
  
"Really?  Do you think we can see it?  They didn't have those in my time," Steve said, kissing her gently again.  
  
"I think they can see something but I don't know how much, but it's supposed to tell us if everything's okay.  I really want it to be okay," Maria said.  
  
"It will be," Steve said.  
  
"Distract me by telling me about the mission," Maria said.  "Did you find the source?"  
  
Steve let the conversation shift and focused on her _safe_ and _warm_ and _okay_ , _she's okay_ , in his arms.  They were going to do this.  
  
 **maternity**  
  
"We haven't started, not really," Steve said, flipping the light on to the nursery.  
  
"Oh.  I'm trying to think of something snarky to say, just give me a minute," Rose said, stepping in.  
  
He'd painted the walls in swirls of soft pastels.  Pink, blue, yellow, green, all flowing in waves and shaping into hearts in the corners of the room.  
  
"We're not allowed to talk about whether it's a boy or girl but I want it to be exposed to color," Steve said.  He'd been reading child development books in secret since he found out.  
  
Rose studied the marble counter with a sink and bath basin complete with diaper dispensers and disposal.  "Stark's contribution, I assume."  
  
"His family was always extravagant," Steve smiled.  "The rocking chair's from Fury and the sculpture is from Thor."  
  
She frowned at the gold winged-lion creature perched on a private shelf above the window where it could keep watch.  "I don't know if I approve of that."  
  
"You'll like Thor," Steve said.  "It's a rare and treasured gift."  
  
"You were a mama's boy, weren't you?" Rose said, fond.  
  
"Yes, ma'am," Steve replied.  "No offense to you, but I can't imagine a better mother than mine." He walked over and ran his fingers over the small, carved cross hanging above where the crib would eventually sit.  "All she ever knew was loss, but she made sure that all I ever knew was love.  I still light a candle for her when I go to confession, I miss her every day."  
  
"I'm sure she's proud of you, Steve," Rose said quietly.  
  
"I know she would have been proud of me for enlisting, proud of me for helping win the war - but I think she be happiest to see me have a family.  I mean, when she died, I was still 85 pounds dripping wet and couldn't take a flight of stairs without keeling over, but now, I mean, I have an amazing fiancée and maybe a baby."  
  
Rose sighed and poked him hard in the side.  "You make it really hard for me to dislike you, Captain Rogers, and I don't appreciate you making me look like a nice mother-in-law."  
  
"I do not apologize," Steve said.  
  
Rose snorted and reached into her massive purse and pulled out several small action figures.  "These need to go on a high shelf so the child doesn't chew on them."  
  
"What are they?" Steve asked curiously.  
  
"My children's favorite toys," Rose replied.  "I figured Maria would be embarrassed if I brought teddy bears or old blankies, but this way, maybe my children's imaginary friends can watch over my grandchild, too."  
  
She held them up one at a time.  "Captain James T. Kirk of the Starship Enterprise.  Snake Eyes, of GI Joe fame, Lion-O, head of the Thundercats, She-Ra, Princess of Power and Share-Bear."  
  
"Share Bear?  Where is he from?" Steve asked.  He had a feeling there were going to be a lot of cartoons in his future.  He also had a feeling Tony and Clint may have to be warned about playing with the toys.  
  
"Paulie went through a phase," Rose said, lining them up on the counter.  
  
 **rock on**  
  
"I think we've found the source of the problems," the doctor said, slowly circling the ultrasound wand over her tiny bump.  
  
She held her breath but Bruce's eyes lit up and he huffed out a laugh.  "Twins."  
  
"Twins?" she said at the same time as Steve.  
  
"We calculated your diet for one baby, but you have two in there, look," the doctor smiled, turning the monitor so she and Steve could see it.  Her mom barely contained a squee behind them.  
  
Steve squinted at the blobs.  "I don't see anything."  
  
"They're tiny little things, but they seem to be developing right on schedule," the doctor said.  
  
"What about the anemia?" Steve asked, squeezing her hand but not looking away from the screen.  (She couldn't pick them out either but she trusted Bruce.)  
  
"We'll modify your diet, you've been doing much better keeping down your meals," Bruce said.  "The infusion helped so we just need to keep your levels closely monitored."  
  
Maria reached over and grabbed Steve's chin, turning his face so he would look at her.  "Hey, we can still do this."  
  
"But now I've got to make another crib," Steve said, stunned.  "I still haven't gotten used to the idea of one and now there's two."  
  
"Neither of you ever have to buy me a birthday or Christmas gift ever again," her mother laughed happily.  
  
"They're okay, though?  I mean, it's not going to be too small in there?" Steve asked.  
  
"It's a tight fit," the doctor smiled.  "And she'll be expected to take it even easier than before."  
  
She winced.  She was hoping to have more energy and permission to use it with a clean ultrasound.  
  
"We're on top of that," her mother said.  
  
"Oh God, I called her in too soon," Maria groaned.  
  
"You'll have plenty to do, dear, with the wedding and baby arrangements," Rose continued.  "She'll stay down."  
  
Steve squeezed her hand and leaned in.  "You're going to get so fat.  It's going to be awesome."  
  
"I can't believe you just said that to her," Bruce said before Maria could smack him.  
  
Her mother snickered.  "Oh, she can hold on to that comment for years of payback."  
  
"Twins," Steve whispered.  
  
"Fuck your supersoldier sperm," she snorted.  
  
"I think that's what caused this problem in the first place, isn't it?" Steve murmured in her ear with a lazy smile.  
  
 **proof of life**  
  
"This isn't a SHIELD channel, Barnes, where the hell are you?" Maria asked when the monitor lit up with the unsteady webcam pointed at Bucky's crotch.  "Back up."  
  
"Sorry, this isn't one of Stark's fancy ones, we're old school," Bucky said, moving aside to reveal a nicotine-yellowed hotel room.  He was wearing a wireless headset so she assumed he was the only one who could hear her.  
  
"I wasn't notified you were outsourcing, Bucky.  Is Natasha with you?"  
  
Bucky shifted uneasily.  "How's the kid?"  
  
"Still in there, Barnes, what - " Maria started, not bothering to correct his question.  She needed to know what he'd gotten himself into and start getting him out of it.  
  
"I need your help with this op," Bucky interrupted.  "I know you're not supposed to get upset and this is going to upset you, but we can't break through our mark's programming and I'm going off-script.  I need your help."  
  
Her gut clenched and she wondered if the babies could kick in disapproval in their tiny state.  "Tell me."  
  
"He knows us, I think.  I mean, he knows Natalia but he doesn't trust her and he knows I'm Bucky Barnes but he also knows I was The Winter Soldier thanks to this," he said, raising his bionic arm.  
  
"What are you talking about?" she asked.  "Is it an agent?"  
  
"I think he's more than that considering we have permission to kill indiscriminately to get him back," Bucky said, maneuvering the camera to the opposite side of the room.  
  
She forgot how to breathe when she recognized Phil Coulson shackled to the frame of the bed.  
  
"He's not a robot, or a life model decoy from Natasha's intel and he's definitely alive; but his brains are scrambled.  He's like us, me and Nat.  But she thinks from the way he's acting, that his interrogation training won't let us break through even if we can crack the programming."  
  
"Fuck," she whispered.  Phil was alive.  Her hand scrabbled for her phone and she sent a text to Clint without letting herself reconsider.  _Comm room now, stay shadowed - alone_.  "Who took him?"  
  
"Natasha's looking into it," Bucky replied quietly.  She knew there would be nothing left if Natasha was 'looking into it'.  
  
Maria considered Phil a brother, a mentor, but Natasha considered him more than that.  He was the first agent to trust her, even before Clint, and she would burn down cities if he asked her to.  
  
"I'd like to come back for the wedding with a successful mission under my belt to impress my boss," Bucky said.  
  
"Fury - "  
  
"He's not my boss," Bucky interrupted.  "You got me back for Steve, gave me Nat, and friends.  This guy is important to everyone I know right now and I don't want to fuck this up.  So pep talk me, _Boss_ , and tell me how to get in this fucker's head."  
  
"He's not asleep," Clint said from behind her in the shadows of the room.  She curled her finger for him to join her by the screen.  
  
"The Council put the kill order out on him," Bucky said, keeping the camera pointed at Coulson but she could sense the guilt behind his words.  "Fury doesn't know he's alive," he added.  
  
She glanced at Clint who knew as well as she did that only half of that was true.  
  
"Anyway, Natasha mentioned that since Phil was one of Fury's darlings that he might have received specialized training," Bucky said.  "Maria unlocked my mind by talking about Steve, part of my source code, but nothing we're trying with this guy is working."  
  
"Dolph Lundgren," Maria said.  
  
"Bless you?" Bucky asked.  
  
"Tell Coulson," Maria ordered.  
  
"What's that mean?" Clint asked, reaching over and squeezing her shoulder.  She knew this was killing him and covered his fingers with her hand.  
  
"Safe word," she explained.  Fury had trained them for anything and everything and she'd been lucky to never have to use most of the fail-safes.  But if Coulson was in there trying to get out, maybe the agent part of his brain would accept he was safe and let him out of the outsider's control.  
  
Bucky appeared onscreen, pulling a chair up to the edge of the bed.  "All right, buddy, my outside consultants say you're not asleep.  They also say 'Dolph Lundgren'."  
  
Phil's eyes snapped open and trained on Bucky.  "Charles Bronson."  
  
Maria choked in relief.  "It's Phil."  
  
"Are you _sure_?" Bucky asked.  
  
" _Are_ you sure?" Clint echoed, his face tight with restrained hope.  
  
"I broke through the programming three days ago but I wasn't sure of your allegiance considering the radio silence with HQ," Phil said to Barnes, finally turning his attention to the screen.  His eyes widened when he saw Clint and Maria.  "Agents.  How long have I been out of contact?"  
  
"We'll take it from here," Natasha's voice broke in and she appeared onscreen in casual and only mildly bloodstained clothes.  "It's best if you're not affiliated with this in any way."  
  
The feed cut out and Maria stood up and embraced Clint.  "Fuck."  
  
"I...I won't believe he's really alive until I see him," Clint whispered.  "Who the hell..."  
  
"We'll find out.  I have a lot of questions for Fury," Maria said.  "If it comes out that he sent them without Council permission; he's going to lose what little ground he's managed to hold at SHIELD."  
  
"Natasha and Bucky can take the fall, they're Avengers, SHIELD can take them off the payroll but they still have the team.  Fury can't know anything," Clint said after a beat.  
  
"You're right, the questions can wait until your zombie gets home," Maria said.  
  
Clint huffed out a laugh and pulled away, swiping his eyes.  "Damn you, woman, all those pregnancy hormones are contagious."  
  
 **reboot**  
  
Bucky was relieved that Coulson was cooperative with Natasha's thorough testing so he could lean back and 'supervise'.  
  
Besides, the view was great.  Natasha was gorgeous.  
  
"I can feel you staring at me," she said as she hovered the handheld detector over Coulson's head.  
  
"I'm supervising," Bucky replied.  "Just keep doing what you're doing, I approve of all of it."  
  
She cut an amused glare in his direction.  
  
"18 months is a long time, if you're satisfied that I'm not an android, I'd really like an update on what I missed," Coulson said, watching them appraisingly  
  
"I had more tests than you're getting yet, fella," Bucky said.  
  
"Who's your commanding officer?" Coulson asked him.  "Why do you think I'm a pirate?"  
  
"He's an Avenger but this isn't official business," Natasha replied with a snort.  She turned to Bucky.  "I think he's clean, we'll take him to the psychics for final confirmation back at HQ."  
  
Bucky studied the guy.  "What did you get Barton for your second anniversary?"  
  
Natasha looked at him sharply.  
  
"A 1943 Bucky Barnes' replica sniper scope," Coulson replied after a beat.  "How do you know that?"  
  
"Barton's a friend of mine.  He conveniently forgot to mention that I wasn't supposed to talk about your whole thing," Bucky said.  
  
"How were you ever a functional spy?  You're such a gossip," Natasha muttered, unlocking the restraints.  
  
"Hey, I can't keep a secret if I'm not told it's supposed to be a secret," Bucky protested.  
  
"How is he?" Coulson asked suddenly.  "The last I remember, he was a brainwashed minion."  
  
"I was still frozen through all that, but I've seen the videos.  He seems fine to me, we hang out a lot on rooftops together," Bucky said.  "I think he talks to me about you because I don't know you in real life.  Maria doesn't talk about you."  
  
"She talks about him with Steve," Natasha said.  
  
"Why would Maria talk to me with Captain America?" Coulson asked.  
  
"Maria and Steve are...close," Natasha said.  "She handles the Avengers now, but she's no longer with SHIELD in an official capacity.  Fury's walking a fine line.  He's not involved in this operation."  
  
"Understood," Coulson said.  "Well, not really, but I know how to stay quiet.  I need too many answers to trust SHIELD right now."  
  
"The Avengers stay in Stark Tower," Bucky said.  "Maria rescued me from SHIELD's science department and got me a walk-on part with the Team."  
  
"You missed a lot, Phil.  You'd be proud.  We're more than a team," Natasha said.  
  
Coulson reached his newly freed hand out and laced his fingers with hers.  "You seem happy."  He glanced at Bucky.  "Compromised, but happy."  
  
"Cap's aware we're involved and he hasn't judged it as a problem," Natasha said, her lips turning up in a genuine smile.  He'd never seen her smile like that.  
  
"He's your James," Coulson said.  
  
"No, he's my Bucky.  But that's okay, too," Natasha said.  
  
"He's right here," Bucky interrupted, but he filed the comment away for thinking later.  His burner phone buzzed and he scanned the display.  "All right, ride will be here in twenty and then it's a straight shot to the safehouse.  Psychic's meeting us on the jet, we need him cleared before we get there."  
  
"When did you arrange that?" Natasha asked.  
  
"I told you I was on top of this op," Bucky preened.  "We got this."  Fury could have his first mate back at SHIELD, Natasha could have her mentor and Clint could have his partner back.  This would be the best wedding gift ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics from Chapter 2 belong to Jimmy Eat World.


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

  
_What giving up gives you_   
_and where giving up takes you._   
_I've had and I've been._

_Here in center frame,_   
_here there's only air._   
_and just enough space to fit._

**packages**  
  
"I ordered something from Craigslist," Maria said, putting a post-it note down on the donut halfway to his mouth.  He frowned, pulled off the post-it and she immediately plucked the donut out of his hands.  
  
"That's not going to be cute much longer," Steve said, scanning the note.  
  
"The guys are going to take you out for breakfast when you go to pick up the package," she said, taking the seat beside him on the couch with a soft bounce.  She caught his concerned gaze and sighed.  "I'm still not made of glass, it's getting up too fast that makes me dizzy."  
  
"Who's going with me on this breakfast fieldtrip?" Steve asked, sliding his arm around her.  
  
"Clint, Tony, Bruce, you know, the gang.  Burn that address, by the way," Maria said, cuddling against him as she inhaled his donut.  
  
He loved Maria as a strong independent woman; but he loved her this way, too.  When she was alone with him, she was relaxed, affectionate and all his.  She let her guard down and that meant everything.  He knew he could be with her forever, or as long as they could get.  
  
"Do we need a truck?  How heavy could it be?" Steve asked.  
  
"Just don't let Barton drive and make sure everyone knows to keep their mouth shut about it until it's back here.  It's really important and hopefully it's going to be good for all of us," Maria said, leaning her head against him.  "I'm going to be having a very public breakfast with Nick at HQ."  
  
"Are you sure you're up to it today?" Steve asked.  
  
"I'm sure.  My iron level's still good and I have my diet log.  I never understood Tony's obsession with coffee until I stopped being able to drink it."  
  
Steve smiled.  Stark had become Tony somewhere along the way and it was just another sign that she was an irrefutable part of his life.  He couldn't lose her.  Or the babies.  "Twins, you know?"  
  
She laughed.  "Yeah, I know.  Crazy."  
  
There was a soft knock on the doorway and Clint peeked into the room.  "Please don't be having pregnant sex in here."  
  
Steve flushed when Maria laughed.  It had taken a lot of research before he'd have sex with her with a baby in there but it still made him feel a little strange as she got bigger.  
  
"Maria, is this what I think it is?" Clint asked, holding up his phone.  
  
"We can't talk about it yet.  It's something I bought off Craigslist," Maria said quickly.  "We have to wait."  
  
Clint visibly deflated and Steve knew he was missing something big.  
  
Maria caught his gaze and shook her head slightly.  "After the package, it'll make sense," she murmured to him.  
  
"Do you know what's taking so long?" Clint asked.  
  
Maria pushed herself carefully off the couch, glaring at Steve when he immediately splayed his hand on her back to steady her.  She walked over to Clint and whispered something in his ear and disappeared into the bedroom.  
  
"Goddamn," Clint sighed, taking her seat on the couch.  
  
"Want to talk about it?"  
  
"Can't yet," Clint replied.  "But I thought…I thought today would be the day."  
  
Natasha appeared in the doorway.  "Is Maria ready?"  
  
"Hey, when did you get back?" Steve asked, ignoring Clint's surprised expression.  
  
"A couple of days ago.  We'll talk later, after our meeting.  Everyone should probably steer clear of HQ until the dust settles," she added.  
  
"I think I need to know what's going on," Steve said.  
  
"No," she snapped sharply before her face settled back to her familiar indifference.  "You all need to keep your hands clean."  
  
Clint's face bloomed into a smile.  "Yeah, Cap, let's go get that breakfast and leave the ladies to handle business."  
  
"Why are you so excited about this instead of being pissed off they're keeping secrets again?" Steve asked when they were alone.  
  
"This is some big shit.  Major," Clint said.  He lowered his voice.  "Fury is not involved.  This has to be handled delicately or it'll end up an even bigger clusterfuck."  
  
"Tell me," Steve demanded.  
  
"Can't yet.  If it matters, Maria and I weren't in on this.  It's all off the books but I think today, they're going to make sure it's on the goddamn books.  I want to know who's behind this," Clint replied darkly.  "I really hope the package is what I think it is."  
  
"Considering how weird everyone's acting, I hope so, too," Steve said.  
  
 **confluence**  
  
"Hey, guys," Bucky grinned when he opened the door of the safehouse.  "Package is upstairs, get off the street."  He scanned the street for changes from his last check as Steve walked in with Tony, Bruce and Clint.  
  
"Sit-rep," Clint said as soon as the door was bolted and locked with the electronic keypad.  
  
Steve shifted into Captain mode and Bucky shifted nervously.  He'd done well so far, working the Op as Bucky with James' instincts filling in the gaps of conscious experience.  But he wondered what Natasha would put in her inevitable report to the Great Pirate Nick.  
  
Tony threw his hands up.  "Okay, my time out is officially over - what the fuck is this all about?"  
  
"What did Pepper threaten you with?" Bruce snorted.  
  
"I knew you were being quiet for a reason," Steve said thoughtfully, as Steve, not Captain.  
  
"We don't know who's involved, I mean, obviously we know it's not you guys, but someone at SHIELD is dirty," Bucky said, waving them into the living room.  "Luckily, we got the heads-up and took care of it, but we don't know who ordered the thing in the first place.  Whoever's running this gig is probably answering to The Council."  
  
"What thing?" Steve asked.  
  
Bucky sat down on the coffee table so he could keep an eye on the security monitors behind the couch.  He leaned forward.  "From what I've seen so far, SHIELD agents aren't too good at trust, they can't be with these kind of jobs.  So when you find people you can trust unconditionally, you have to keep them; because if you don't, someone else is going to take them and try to use them to slit your throat."  
  
"Bucky, come on, spit it out," Tony groaned.  
  
"Who at SHIELD do you trust?" Bucky asked him.  
  
"Nobody.  Maria, but she's ours now," Tony replied.  
  
"And who does Fury trust?" Bucky asked.  
  
"Nobody now that Phil...sorry, Clint," Bruce edited.  
  
Bucky pointed upstairs.  "Yeah."  
  
"Is he stable?" Clint asked, visibly controlling his voice.  
  
"He's got shitty taste in music, but I don't know if that's new.  We've had three psychics check him and a couple of doctors have scanned him for hardware, but Natasha wants Bruce and Tony on it," Bucky said.  
  
"Coulson's alive?" Tony whispered.  
  
"He's not a robot or an LMD.  Docs say it's him.  He has a scar," Bucky said, gesturing to his torso.  "He had some surgery, but nobody needs a spleen or all those extra intestines."  
  
Clint clenched his fists.  "What was his count?"  
  
"Lot lower than the rest of the brainwashed assassin club," Bucky replied.  "Six.  Mostly bad guys."  
  
Steve glanced between them.  "Someone took Coulson and brainwashed him into an assassin?"  
  
"Fury said he was dead," Bruce frowned.  
  
"Fury _thought_ he was dead."  Bucky glanced at his watch.  "He should be finding out the truth from our ladies right about now."  
  
"Pepper, too?" Tony questioned, visibly surprised.  
  
Bucky flicked his eyes at the ceiling.  "If he's clean, Natasha wants him under the Avengers' umbrella, but we need him at SHIELD.  The girls are going to confront Fury, he'll throw a fit and have legitimate reasons to clean house.  Maria and Pepper hold a lot of our choke collars and SHIELD knows it."  
  
"Any reason Coulson's not down here telling us himself?" Bruce asked after a long moment for everything to sink in.  
  
"He was in the shower.  He'll be down when he's done," Bucky said.  "We need to make sure none of you trigger him."  
  
"What about Fury?  I mean, he seems like a pretty big target for people inside and outside of SHIELD," Tony said.  
  
Steve scanned Bucky's face, thoughtful.  "I don't think that's a problem."  
  
"But you said he didn't know," Tony said, picking up the thread.  
  
"Someone had to put our spies on the case," Steve said under his breath.  "Best not to think about it right now."  
  
"While we wait for our guest to arrive, how's the Boss?" Bucky asked Steve, giving him a small nod of appreciation from cutting off the questions.  
  
Steve grinned widely.  "She had an ultrasound, there's two."  
  
"Twins?" Bucky asked after a beat to do the math.  
  
"Barnes, if you're watching porn on SHIELD's tab, it's going to come out of your check," Coulson said, walking in and freezing when he saw the room full of people.  
  
Tony broke the silence.  "Agent.  Rumors of your death have been greatly exaggerated."  
  
"Check him, Barton," Bucky said, snapping Clint out of his shared trance with Phil.  
  
Clint and Phil began speaking in a foreign language and Bucky turned his attention to Tony.   "So, you think you can spare another room for a former assassin?"  
  
"I don't think he's going to need his own room," Steve smiled when Tony snorted in response.  
  
"That's not how you check him, Barton!" Bucky called when he saw Phil and Clint holding each other tightly.  
  
 **ricotta**  
  
"Mr. Coulson, please step into the designated area so you can be verified."  
  
Clint and Bruce laughed and Phil glanced at them blankly, obeying JARVIS' request.  
  
Bucky stepped up between Steve and Tony.  "J doesn't sound happy."  
  
"He knows how much Coulson meant to Pepper," Tony said after a beat.  Steve didn't call him on the omission of himself.  "He's protective."  
  
JARVIS scanned Phil with red, white and blue lines before Tony cleared his throat.  "JARVIS, no need to show off, is he acceptable?"  
  
"I would suggest he not be left unsupervised, Sir," JARVIS replied.  
  
"I'm on duty," Clint replied, draping an arm around Phil's shoulders.  
  
"Natasha's handing over the recordings of our sessions to Maria, JARVIS will believe her," Bucky said.  
  
Steve glanced at him.  "How do you know?"  
  
"I can't have a snoopy invisible guy watching me all the time if I don't know who he answers to.  Stark's his boss, obviously, then Pepper and then you," Bucky said.  
  
Steve didn't know that and shot a glance at Tony.  
  
Tony shrugged.  "Why do you think he lobbied so hard for full access to your floor?  Protective.  Or offended, since you, Maria and Rose don't let him do things."  
  
"He's your AI, not ours," Steve frowned.  He liked JARVIS.  
  
"Excuse me, but did you say Rose?  Maria's mother?" Phil interrupted.  
  
"She flew home a couple of days ago, she'll be back in a month and a half," Steve replied.  
  
"He doesn't know Maria's living his teenage fantasy yet," Clint snickered.  
  
"Are the girls back yet, JARVIS?" Tony called.  
  
"The _ladies_ are congregated in the common area.  They are dealing with a cheesecake emergency," JARVIS replied.  
  
"Oh.  What kind of emergency?" Steve asked.  
  
"Shit," Clint blanched.  "I ate all the cheesecake last night."  
  
"Do I need to go to the store?" Steve offered.  He stepped on the elevator before the answer because he wanted to check on Maria before he had to head out again.  He didn't think today would be considered low-stress for her.  
  
"I have placed an urgent order with the bakery and charged it to Agent Barton's account," JARVIS replied.  
  
Clint sighed.  "Fine, thank you, JARVIS."  
  
Phil glanced between them, but Steve didn't know if his frown was disapproving or just confused.  
  
Steve spotted Maria sitting on the counter in the kitchen swinging her feet.  "You shouldn't be up there," he scolded, sliding his arms around her and kissing her softly.  
  
"No PDAs in the kitchen, we have rules for a reason," Bruce called.  
  
"How'd it go at HQ?" Steve asked as Pepper squealed and cooed over Phil behind him.  
  
"It's messy, but Nick's on top of it for now," she replied.  "How's the package?"  
  
"I barely knew him before but Clint and Tony seem convinced.  JARVIS is watching him," Steve said.  "You okay?"  
  
"I'm fine.  I wanted cheesecake," Maria sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder.  
  
Phil stepped over and cleared his throat.  "Agent Hill.  Apparently we need to have a conversation."  
  
"About your boytoy eating all the cheesecake?" Maria smiled widely and slid off the counter to embrace the man.  "Damned good to see you."  
  
When she released him Coulson put his hand on her stomach.  "Several conversations.  _Maria_."  
  
"14 weeks and it's been fine," Maria said.  She pulled his hand away and he caught her wrist.  
  
"You're wearing Nick's grandma's ring?" Coulson gasped.  "I think I need another brainsweep."  
  
 **reins**  
  
"What does Rose think of Captain America?" Phil asked her when they were finally secluded on the balcony with the Avengers inside with tonight's Breaking Bad.  
  
"Mom doesn't like Captain America much, but she _adores_ Steve," Maria answered.  "I got shot last year.  Took a couple to the leg and the side and Fury called her in.  We've called a cease fire, whether it's because of Steve or my resulting job change, I'll never know for sure.  But it's good to have her on my side right now."  
  
"Your medical file said that it wasn't safe for you to conceive," Phil said quietly.  Concerned.  
  
She settled back against the pillows, Steve's eyes tracking her slight movement through the window.  "I saw a lot of doctors.  Steve's, kind of, overprotective at times and these kids are his, too.  I never considered kids, before or after the ambush and all these doctors say it was a fluke that I got pregnant at all...but if I managed not to miscarry in the first trimester then there's no reason I can't take it all the way."  
  
"He loves you," Phil said.  
  
"It's mutual," she whispered.  "It just came out of nowhere.  We were friends and then...I can't imagine my life without him now.  It changes everything."  
  
"Love has a tendency to do that.  I never thought you'd walk away from SHIELD willingly," Phil said.  
  
"You were missed, Phil.  Have you talked to Nick?" she whispered.  
  
Phil looked away.  "Briefly.  He doesn't know who took me, Maria, he doesn't know what was done to me, or why I killed those men..."  
  
She reached out and took his wrist.  "Hey.  We'll figure it out.  We didn't get Bucky Barnes back after 70 years as an assassin to lose you after only a year or so in puppetland."  
  
"Bucky idolizes you.  Whatever you did - " Phil began.  
  
"I did what you would have done.  What you _did_ for Natasha, and Clint.  I believed in him.  Not who he was before, not the sniper or the assassin, but the man he could be.  I believe in that and hopefully he'll believe it, too."  
  
"You used to give me such hell about my pet agents," Phil smiled.  "Now you're collecting superheroes."  
  
Steve cleared his throat, holding up a blanket.  "JARVIS says you'll be cold in 12 minutes if you don't bundle up."  
  
She sighed and slid over so Steve could sit down beside her as personal space heater and snoop.  "Thank you, JARVIS," she said.  
  
"Of course, Ms. Hill," the AI replied.  
  
"We were reprimanded for upsetting him so we have to make sure and appreciate our robot overlords," Steve said, earning a smile from Coulson.  
  
God, it was good to have Phil back.  She definitely needed to know what happened to him; but for the moment, she was just grateful to have him here.  
  
"Seems you've adjusted well to the future, Captain."  
  
"Steve.  If I'm not in the suit, I'm Steve.  I definitely like this century a lot more than I used to.  I've found good friends, got a brother back from the dead and started a family," he said, kissing the side of her forehead and rearranging the blanket around her shoulders.  
  
"I'm genuinely sorry I missed it.  I have a contract for anyone engaging in sexual contact with my agents," Phil said.  
  
"He seriously does," Maria told Steve.  
  
"I think it's a little late for that, Agent, but I'm in this for the long haul," Steve smiled.  "And Clint's a friend of mine, so I'd like to politely warn you not to fuck him up.  He's had a rough time."  
  
"Noted," Phil replied, impressed.  
  
"We're going to limit your access for a few days until Bruce and Tony are satisfied with science and you'll be spending a lot of time with Maria and Bucky.  They've got more practice with deprogramming than the rest of us, exempting Nat but we need her in the field," Steve said to Phil who only blinked at the orders.  
  
"Got something?" Maria asked.  She left her phone in the house, like a rookie.  
  
"Just gossip from the backup teams, a few blips in Nepal caught Ward's attention and he's got a good eye," Steve said.  
  
"Part of the Avengers' continued partnership with SHIELD includes teams dedicated to the Avengers' Initiative.  They train with Steve and the others and we've been doing pretty good in terms of civilian casualties even if property damage is still an issue.  Agent May leads our Wave 3 team," Maria explained to Phil.  
  
"Surprised you got her out of retirement," Phil said.  
  
"You were missed," Maria replied.  
  
"As soon as you're cleared, we'll introduce you," Steve said.  
  
Maria finally caught on that Steve was politely warning Coulson from getting too comfortable.  Steve had a right to be suspicious, they all did, but he was the only one willing to say it out loud - albeit in a roundabout way.  
  
"Understood.  You should take precautions.  I don't know enough about what was done to me to honestly argue that I'm safe," Phil said.  
  
"I trust Bucky and Natasha's judgment, but there are too many different ways to get in people's heads these days for us to rest easy.  Natasha had old fashioned brainwashing, Bucky had science and Clint had magic.  We'll figure out what they did to you and then discuss what's next.  Maria's going to need someone to take her chair while she's...gestating."  
  
"Oh my God, stop talking now," Maria gasped.  "Never say that again."  
  
 **salsa**  
  
"I don't think we have to worry about those cells right now, Logan's been following their ringleaders.  His guys are on it, we don't want to step on Xavier's toes again," Steve said, motioning to the hologram of current threats at their daily meeting.  
  
Natasha flipped a page.  "I didn't see that in the SHIELD intel."  
  
"Steve plays poker with him twice a month," Tony answered from across the room at his console.  
  
"Did you go without me while I was gone?  How much did you lose?" Bucky laughed.  
  
"We're working now," Steve said, glaring at Clint when he signed the losses.  
  
Maria reached out and snatched his hand suddenly and pressed it against her stomach.  "Shh."  
  
He opened his mouth to question her anyway but the tiny thump against his palm shut him up.  
  
"I don't think that's gas," Maria said.  "Oh God, what if they're trying to claw their way out?"  
  
"Shh," he whispered.  Another thump.  "Wow."  
  
"Come check this out, this is insane," Maria said, tugging up her shirt to bare her swollen belly.  
  
"Are you sure this doesn't count as sexual harassment?" Tony asked, but his hand was the first after Steve's on her stomach.  
  
"What does it feel like?" Steve asked Maria.  Tony's face bloomed into an honest smile.  
  
"Like an alien or a bad taco," Maria said but her eyes were bright.  Excited.  Happy.  
  
"There are really little people in there.  That's unbelievable," Bucky said, poking her stomach after his turn.  
  
"No poking," Maria giggled.  
  
Steve leaned over and kissed her.  "Alien tacos, huh?"  
  
She pulled his hand down to her stomach again.  "They like you.  They kick when you talk."  
  
"Smart alien tacos, then, good to know," he whispered, kissing her again.  
  
They were really going to do this.  
  
"We should finish this meeting so we can coo over lunch," Tony suggested.  "I can't believe I just said 'coo'."  
  
"I could eat," Maria said.  "What's the most recent update on Coulson?"  
  
"He's been fully reinstated and he scared Park out of his office this morning so things are falling into place on that side.  Also, several members of the Council have been rotated out pending Fury's ongoing house-cleaning.  Right now, the biggest issue he's facing is that our backup teams don't trust him," Natasha said.  
  
Natasha and Clint still had a regular presence at SHIELD HQ, always on standby for sensitive missions despite their Avenger status.  They were supervising Phil's reintegration under Fury's regime as well as monitoring him for signs that his programming was still inactive.  
  
"May doesn't trust him and they're all twitchy since Maria's been AWOL.  They don't understand why you're giving him lead on the big missions instead of taking them yourself," Natasha said.  
  
"We've told them Coulson's on the level," Steve said thoughtfully.  
  
"Bring May and Ward to the Tower for a meeting.  We were going to invite them to the wedding anyway, they'll figure it out on their own if we don't tell them the details now.  They're going to need to work with Phil so you guys can be in the field without having to play liaison," Maria said.  
  
"I think we can trust them," Steve said, carefully pulling her shirt down and splaying his hand over her stomach.  "Maybe if we explain SHIELD's connection with Coulson's disappearance, they'll understand why he's back from the dead."  
  
"I'll arrange a meeting," Natasha said.  
  
"I think I want tacos now," Bucky yawned.  
  
"JARVIS already put in an order," Tony grinned.  
  
 **reprimand**  
  
"Please tell me this is a joke."  Melinda May smacked her on the back of the head.  "We took sex ed together at the Academy."  
  
" _Oh_.  I can't believe this scenario wasn't on any of our lists," Ward said.  "Congratulations."  
  
Melinda took the seat next to her.  "I thought..."  
  
Maria waved her off.  "I wasn't supposed to be able to get knocked up, but shit happens.  My light duty got reduced a couple of weeks ago, I'm going to be on full bedrest eventually.  We need to keep it quiet."  
  
Ward nodded first.  "Understood.  Cap must be over the moon."  
  
"Hasn't shown it in the field.  Ward's right, we didn't consider this scenario.  We thought you were having issues from last year's shootout," Melinda said, her eyes flicking across the engagement ring before flashing a small smile.  
  
"How are you going to play this?" Ward said.  
  
"We're not going public.  We're going to have a small wedding after I pop these kids out but it'll be under assumed but validated names.  Captain America will never be seen with the babies, but Stephen R. Hill will be their legal father."  
  
"Twins, no shit," Ward snorted.  
  
"You live with the Avengers, Maria, they'll be targets," Melinda said.  
  
"I know, that's why we're trying to do this right and keep it quiet."  Maria turned to her.  "Phil, it's really him.  Fury's on the warpath because someone at SHIELD took his body and turned him into a killer.  You know about Bucky, Clint and Natasha - we can get people back sometimes and we got Coulson back.  We don't know who pulled the strings or what kind of mojo they used on him, but we know that we have the real Coulson.  I would never trust him with my people, and that includes your people, if I didn't believe it."  
  
"If SHIELD did it to him, why is he working for them again?" Ward asked.  
  
"Bait.  You've got eyes on him," May replied.  
  
"We're hoping Nick can ruffle enough feathers and find out the source of this whole thing.  It's going to be big."  She turned to Melinda again.  "May, you know I've lived and bled for SHIELD, but Coulson's one of ours and he didn't deserve this.  Blame it on the babies or the boyfriend, but I have a bigger appreciation for my friends than I could have said last year."  
  
"No, you're right.  SHIELD's been shadier lately than I'm completely comfortable with.  That's why I couldn't just welcome Phil home without questioning it," Melinda said.  
  
"We have to question each other, it's part of our jobs," Maria replied.  "But I need to know my teams are going to be able to do their jobs regardless of any drama behind the desks."  
  
"How can we help?  I mean, not with all that," Ward said, motioning to her stomach.  "But what else?"  
  
Melinda rolled her eyes.  Maria wondered what was going on between the two of them.  
  
"I don't like not being able to watch my people's backs, especially when there's so much going on behind the scenes.  You're both SHIELD agents and I know you have to follow the party line, but I hope you'll use your best judgment if it comes down to the wire," Maria said.  "Steve trusts both of you, but he hasn't worked with Phil yet and I'd like things to run as smoothly as possible."  
  
"We'll arrange some more training sessions, we know how much Cap likes training," Ward said.  "And I'll keep my ears open for any chatter."  Melinda gave him a look and he stepped out of the room.  
  
"Please don't say this is 'girl talk' time," Maria warned.  
  
You're a brave bitch, Maria.  Natasha will be fine, but I'll look after your boys for you.  I really hope you can pull this off," she added.  
  
"Me, too," Maria admitted.  "It's definitely not how I thought I'd be spending my 30's."  
  
"You'll be a soccer mom before you know it."  
  
"Fuck soccer, I'm enrolling them in karate preschool," Maria snorted.  
  
"Keep us in the loop, okay?" Melinda said, kindly.  
  
"Why, are you up for babysitting duty?"  
  
Melinda wrinkled her nose.  "I was thinking more that I'll keep you updated on your team in the field and you keep us updated on what's going on off the field.  We could've helped Barnes and the Widow retrieve Coulson."  
  
"Unfortunately, I didn't know about that op until after the fact," Maria said.  
  
Melinda took a deep breath and lowered her voice.  "Are you aware of what it's going to do to Captain Rogers if something happens to you?"  
  
"He's a professional, he'll do his job.  And I don't plan on letting anything happen to me," Maria replied.  "I don't want to be anyone's weakness.  I might be one of Fury's 'pets' but he wouldn't let me have this job if he thought either of us was too compromised to handle it."  She looked down at her bump.  "I'm invested in getting these kids out of me so I have to step back from the job."  
  
Melinda nodded.  "Noted.  And if they're cute, I might consider babysitting."  
  
She frowned at the agent.  "Of course they'll be cute."  
  
"Well, you are banging Captain America, so they'll at least have some good DNA to work with," Melinda smiled.  
  
 **honey-sweet**  
  
"Reed doesn't let me talk about having kids," Susan Storm blurted out.  
  
Maria and Pepper glanced at each other.  She'd invited Sue for wedding window shopping since she'd been emailing her encouragement over the past few weeks.  She couldn't let petty jealousy keep her from being nice to the well-meaning invisible woman.  
  
"Do you _want_ kids?" Maria asked after a moment to process.  
  
"Reed seems a lot like Tony, but I'll deny saying it if he ever asks.  Spends too much time in his head to focus on much else," Pepper said, putting down the lacy thing Maria wouldn't even know what to do with.  
  
"I want a family.  I mean, I love Johnny and I helped raise him but I want a child with Reed, I want to make a family that's both ours but he says it's too dangerous.  I thought..." Sue sighed heavily and started shuffling the dresses distractedly.  
  
"Steve and I will never be able to go public, Sue," Maria said carefully, ignoring Pepper's barely hidden surprise.  "It's not the same for us."  
  
The twins shifted inside her and she had a rush of pity and understanding.  "We have to make sacrifices for our jobs.  But my kids only have one superhero contributing to their DNA.  Shit, girl, you can go invisible and make forcefields, I'm pretty sure you could look after a kid with or without your egghead."  
  
"Mobsters have children that are born into danger, it can be done," Pepper agreed.  
  
"We're not mobsters, but that makes sense," Sue replied thoughtfully.  "Yeah."  
  
"Steve thinks a lot of you and Johnny, we'd watch your back," Maria said.  
  
Pepper nodded, picking up the lacy thing again.  "I think Cap's even got his X-Men buddies on the lookout.  Your guys haven't made any enemies on the good side of the law that I know of, and children are precious."  
  
"The public loves your team more than the Avengers most of the time, they would probably treat your kid like royalty," Maria added.  
  
Sue pulled a long slinky dress off the rack and held it up.  "Johnny's been amazing at wrangling the paparazzi for us, he could probably work them out like Katie Holmes did with her kid."  
  
"I'm going to get the twins into the private preschool where she sent her daughter," Pepper said.  
  
"My twins?" Maria asked.  
  
Pepper smirked.  "I've been handling the paparazzi for Tony for over a decade.  Your kids might not be famous, but they're going to be spoiled and rich.  There's a waiting list and I was being proactive."  
  
"Does Reed know you want kids?" Maria asked, pushing aside her questions for Pepper for the moment.  
  
"We talked about it before we got married.  Turn around," Sue said, holding the dress up.  
  
"Too shiny," Maria decided.  "I don't want a mermaid dress, or a ball gown, gross."  
  
"How do you feel about lace corsets?" Pepper asked.  
  
Sue and Maria both vetoed Pepper for the next half hour in protest of the suggestion.  
  
"What about you, Pepper?  Do you and Tony ever talk about kids?" Sue asked when they had moved on to shoes.  
  
"He had a vasectomy in his twenties," Pepper answered, avoiding their eyes.  "He's got frozen samples somewhere, I think.  I'm not ready for that.  He did bring it up after Maria's announcement.  Said we can't discuss it until he gets his two year chip or a cure for cancer."  
  
"Would you consider it?  Because if this hadn't happened, I would never have considered it," Maria said honestly.  
  
Pepper examines a pair of impossibly high heels.  "I love Tony.  I think we'd have amazing children but we'd have to be in it together.  Completely.  Tony's mercurial, he's only found a balance in the past couple of years and I think we both need to be ready for it.  I love my life the way it is, I can wait."  
  
Maria spotted a pair of pumps she probably couldn't afford.  She heard the explosion before she saw the robot arachnid through the blast.  
  
She dropped to the floor and pinned Pepper to give her cover but there was no rain of shrapnel or heat of fire.  
  
"You're an idiot - you're pregnant, you can't just go around bodyslamming people," Susan said.  Her extended hand held back the worst of the blast with her invisible forcefield.  
  
Pepper frowned at her, gently rolling her onto her back and looking down at her.  "I'm telling Steve."  
  
"But I'm wearing the special bodysuit," Maria said.  "I'm fine."  
  
They were distracted by the robot being disabled in a flurry of webbing.  
  
"Spiderman's got it, let's head back before Maria starts doing cartwheels," Sue said.  
  
 **standard surveillance**  
  
"Marco needs backup at the deli, he's getting creamed," Bucky said into his headset and glaring at Phil who flashed a look at him.  They had to share the multiple monitors in the commons area and Bucky wasn't sure he liked the other man's style yet.  
  
"Iron Man, scan for EMPs, the climbers have something on their backs that look like that thing in Boston," Maria said from behind them.  
  
Bucky and Phil both turned to glare at her where she was 'resting' on the couch with her tablet.  
  
 _"Goddammit, I need to stay high, I'll try and thin them out,_ " Tony said.  
  
"EMPs mean you stand down, Stark.  Return to base," Phil said.  
  
Bucky held his breath and waited for Maria to contradict the order.  
  
" _Captain_?" Tony called finally.  
  
" _Head back to the Tower and find us a source.  We need your brains more than we need your suit right now_ ," Steve said after a beat.  
  
Phil huffed in surprise.  "I can't believe he actually listened."  
  
"Widow, you've got eight bots on your tail, too many for hand to hand," Bucky spotted.  
  
Maria tapped her tablet.  "Try the new plasma grenades, Widow, it'll buy you enough time to reload."  
  
Rose cleared her throat and Bucky didn't dare turn around for the scolding.  
  
Something exploded onscreen and Steve's shield spun through the frame.  
  
"Sit-rep," Phil barked.  
  
 _"There are mines in the manhole covers,_ " Steve answered hoarsely.  
  
Something else exploded and Natasha spoke.  " _Grenades are a go._ "  
  
" _Barton, blow all the manholes you can hit, take them out with their own bombs,_ " Steve coughed.  
  
Rose gasped when Tony landed and whirred out of his suit as he hurried from the landing pad into the penthouse in jeans and a t-shirt smeared with mustard.  "This is not a low-stress environment, Maria!"  
  
Tony accepted the headset from Bucky and ignored Rose completely to squeeze onto the couch with Maria.  "You were right about Boston, these bots are too similar to ignore - they're running off plasma energy, so there's no main source, it's not a hive mind."  
  
Rose frowned further and Bucky knew that intervention was needed.  He picked up a pad and walked over to her.  "Write down everything you think is wrong and we'll discuss it later.  Triage means it has to wait," he said.  She thumped him with the pad but sat down on the loveseat.  
  
" _Are their power sources self-sustaining?  Are we going to have to take them one at a time because.._." Barton muttered.  
  
"Running low on arrows already, Katniss?" Tony asked.  
  
"Chatter," Maria scolded.  
  
"The plasma grenades the Widow used took out more bots than it should have, I think they're our best bet," Phil said.  
  
 _"Cap needs backup, Ward, can you get there?_ " Barton called.  
  
Bucky scanned the screens until he spotted Steve wrestling with the five legged robot with blood covering the top half of his suit.  " _I see him, give me a couple more yards..."_ Ward panted.  
  
"Captain, duck and cover, they're going to flashbang you," Phil said, steady.  
  
"Count him in, Ward," Maria followed suit.  "How's the perimeter holding?"  
  
 _"We've got them boxed in, closing in on three blocks.  The grenades are effective,_ " Agent May answered.  
  
"Flashbang - the light, it might disable their visuals," Tony said.  
  
 _"On two, Cap..."_  
  
Steve bundled up like an armadillo underneath his shield and the screen flashed white.  
  
Robots in a 30 yard area burst into flame.  
  
 _"Save the plasma grenades and let's light up this town,"_ Barton snickered.  
  
"Ward, what's Cap's condition?" Tony asked.  Rose fanned herself and glared at each of them in turn.  
  
 _"Still standing, like to go home soon, though,_ " Steve replied breathlessly.  
  
"We can probably call in SHIELD to finish up, get all open wounds to medical and make sure you tag enough of those bots for Stark to play with," Phil said.  
  
"Barton, make sure the manholes are cleared before opening the perimeter for SHIELD's teams," Bucky said.  
  
 _"I'll clear them a path, it's like disco inferno out here,_ " Barton said.  
  
 _"I'm bringing the Captain in, Ward's back with his team clearing out the stragglers,_ " Natasha said.  He was relieved to see her intact with Steve stumbling beside her toward one of the outlying vans.  
  
"Tony, come with me to headquarters, Bucky, we'll conference you in for your report," Phil said.  
  
"Don't even think about it," Rose snapped when Maria opened her mouth.  Maria closed her mouth.  
  
"Thank you for the backup, email me your thoughts when you're done with lying down for the next four hours," Phil ordered, giving Rose a wide berth.  
  
"I'm hungry, are you hungry?" Bucky said when Phil and Tony had taken the elevator.  
   
"There's no reason you have to be here for this, it seemed like they handled it on their own just fine," Rose said, ignoring him completely.  
   
Bucky cut his eyes to Maria.  She had helped, but her mom was right.  
   
"This wasn't even a high-stress mission," Maria said, but her knuckles were white on her tablet.  
   
 _"Barnes.  Tell your boss that Cap's okay, took a couple of stabs to the belly but nothing fatal.  He's going to be late getting back."_  
   
"Thanks, Widow, I'll pass that along," Bucky said.  Maybe not the 'stab' part.  
   
"Sit rep?" Maria asked him.  
  
"Cap's fine, but he's going to be stuck in medical for a bit," Bucky said.  
  
"Okay.  Good.  Go heat up the leftover stromboli while I argue with my mother," Maria handwaved him, but she gave him a grateful nod.  
  
As soon as both of his feet crossed into the kitchen, Rose's voice filled the space behind him.  _"You can't sit there and tell me watching your boyfriend and your friends get shot at by robots is low-stress - you are on medical leave!"_  
  
 _"It's Phil's first mission leading my team and I'm still on light duty..."_  
  
 _"Phil's been leading men into battle since before you went into basic, don't even try that - "_  
  
 _"It took years to get these guys to trust me, I'm not just handing them off - "_  
  
 _"No, instead, you're two steps away from strapping into a flak jacket and playing human shield for executives - "_  
  
 _"That was an accident - I've served my time for that - "_  
  
 _"This isn't a jail sentence - "_  
  
 _"There are lives at stake out there, I trust my team but - "_  
  
 _"There are lives at stake in here, too!"_  
  
Bucky winced.  He remembered Steve's mother more than he remembered his own, but Rose was nothing like Sarah.  Sarah was all soft words, tired eyes and kind touches.  Steve's gentle soul was all due to his mother and he figured Maria's toughness was due to Rose.  
  
He sighed and dropped one of Stark's, probably expensive, coffee mugs on the floor with a crash.  "Oh no, I made a mess," he said in a loud voice.  
  
Rose hurried into the kitchen, frowning.  "Useless, the lot of you, get out of here and let me clean up - I'll bring lunch."  
  
He winked at Maria when he walked back into the main room and she relaxed against the sofa.  "Lie down, she won't yell if you try a little harder to look lazy."  
  
"I didn't even have all the screens you and Phil did," Maria sighed, but she raised her legs onto the couch and adjusted the pillows behind her.  
  
He leaned over and put his metal hand over her stomach.  _Crazy_.  "What do you say, JARVIS?"  
  
Rose stepped into the room curiously as JARVIS lit up the hologram displaying the ultrasound image.  "Tony's got too much time on his hands," he told her.  
  
JARVIS spoke primly.  "Miss Hill's ultrasound is within normal parameters.  Her heartbeat is mildly elevated and she has not fulfilled her minimum 16 ounces of fluid requirement for the morning."  
  
"Steve's going to be busted up when he gets home, you need to be on your game, Boss," Bucky said quietly.  
  
"Stop being sensible.  Keep your headset on," Maria conceded, handing him the tablet.  
  
"Yes ma'am," Bucky grinned, placing the computer out of reach and tossing a blanket at her.  
  
Rose walked in with a tray of leftovers and bottled juice.  
  
"Thanks, Mom.  No more arguing," Maria said, holding up her fist.  Rose snorted but bumped knuckles with her.  
  
"We can call time out for now," Rose huffed fondly, passing her a plate.  
  
He had a break for debriefing before Rose kidnapped him to rinse the dishes.  
  
"It doesn't hurt your arm to get it wet?" Rose asked, watching him.  
  
"Nah, it's multifunctional," Bucky said.  "You're probably not supposed to see it without the gloves, but I'm doing dishes."  
  
"Did you lose it in the war?"  
  
"Best not to talk about things like that.  It's very complicated and I can't discuss it without armed supervision," Bucky said.  "Does it bother you?"  
  
Rose scanned him with sharp eyes.  "I'm just trying to figure you out.  You treat her like a little sister."  
  
"Never had a sister, but I always had Steve.  Those big blue eyes were even more undeniable when he was a skinny little runt," he snickered.  "First time I pulled him out of a scrap, I wanted to throttle him myself - he had no sense of self-preservation."  He put down the sponge and dried his hands.  "I looked out for him as best I could, more when his ma passed, but then the war... and he started looking out for me.  Steve's my family, he's the clearest and strongest of the memories I have left and there's no way anything's going to happen to his girl while I'm here."  
  
Rose nodded.  "Can I ask you something else?"  
  
"You can ask," Bucky shrugged.  He flexed his hand and hoped JARVIS was monitoring his brainwaves to make sure he wasn't going to trigger.  It had been almost a year, but it would always hang in the shadows of his mind.  
  
"Did you know Steve's mother?" she asked.  
  
"Why?" Bucky replied automatically.  
  
"He mentioned her to me, when he was showing me the nursery.  Maria lets you and Steve take care of her.  Figured that talent must come from somewhere," Rose said.  
  
"Sarah Rogers was a good woman," Bucky replied honestly.  "I used to pray with her beside Steve's hospital bed when he was sick and she was too tired to get her jacket off.  Then I had to pray with Steve at her bedside and I think...neither one of us were the same after she died.  She could've had a much better life if she'd given him up but she treated Steve like he was golden.  She always believed that he would be something amazing.  She would have smacked him if she knew he enlisted.  Family was everything to her, it was precious and she did everything she possibly could to make sure Steve lived long enough to become the man he is."  
  
He pulled himself out of maudlin and focused on Rose.  "The reason Maria bickers with you is because your opinion is the only one in the world that matters to her.  She doesn't give a damn about what we think of her, she's our boss - but you - you're the one she has to impress.  If she was in there crying her eyes out, admit it, you wouldn't know what to do," Bucky said.  
  
"Of course I would.  I would tell JARVIS to get one of you sappy senior citizens to come up here and make her stop."  
  
 **dropkick**  
  
"JARVIS, can you call the medics?"  
  
"I am dialing them now - protocol 5 is active. Dr. Banner is on his way."  
  
She didn't thank him because another shard of pain stabbed her abdomen.  
  
 _"Maria? Hey, look at me..."_  
  
"There's blood and it hurts," Maria said.  
  
"We're getting you help, lie down, let me see..."  
  
He was in full doctor mode and she let him lay her down and check her vitals and below the belt with his hand hot across her stomach.  
  
"Maria, don't panic, it's going to be okay, you have to calm down. You're having false contractions but you have to relax, your blood pressure is too high." Bruce filled her vision.  
  
"What about the blood?" Maria asked.  
  
"You've been spotting throughout your pregnancy, the OB says not to panic, she's going to meet us downstairs so we don't have to move you too far. Try and catch your breath," Bruce soothed, squeezing her hand as the medics she hadn't processed arriving watched the portable heart monitors.  
  
"Two healthy heartbeats, a little fast because their mom is freaking out, but steady and sure," Bruce said. "Deep breath."  
  
She forced air into her lungs and tried to steady herself.  
  
"You're all okay, take another breath."  
  
She didn't surface completely from her panic until she was in the medbay with Dr. Kellum giving her a lecture about the meaning of bedrest.  
  
Steve stepped into the room with Bruce, still in uniform with bloody claw marks down both sleeves and across his neck.  "Hey."  
  
"You had time to clean up," she said, finding his hand.  
  
" _Protocol 5_. How is she?" Steve asked asked, kissing her cheek and avoiding her eyes to hide his worry.  
  
"She needs to stay off her feet.  Bathroom and back, that's all.  No more work," Dr. Kellum said, pulling up a chair and nudging Steve to sit down.  
  
"You have a placental abruption, Maria.  It's when the placenta separates from the uterine lining.  It's very serious, but we caught it and now we can monitor it."  
  
She felt her lungs deflate.  "This is bad."  
  
"It's treatable, Maria, the babies are fine," Bruce said before Dr. Kellum could scare her any worse.  
  
"No, I read about this, you just have to take it easy," Steve said, tapping her chin until she met his gaze.  "The babies are fine and you're fine.  The rest we can handle."  
  
"This is bad," she repeated.  
  
She couldn't fight this.  This was completely out of her control.  She was carrying defenseless tiny lives in a body that was betraying her.  
  
"Hey, hey." Steve cupped her face and she opened her eyes.  "We can do this.  There's no going back.  We can do this, you're doing so well..."  
  
"I'm going to lose them," she whispered.  
  
"No.  Don't think like that.  We're going to get through this.  You're not going to lose them, not when you've brought them this far.  I love you.  Say it back."  
  
"Fuck.  I love you, too.  Steve..."  
  
He wrapped his arms around her, surrounding her senses.  "It's okay, you're okay," he murmured.  
  
She took a breath and a sob bubbled out.  
  
"Shh, baby, shh, it's okay," he whispered, rocking her and rubbing circles into her back as she tried to catch her breath and fisted her fingers in the ripped fabric of his suit.  "Please don't cry, we've stopped alien invasions together, we'll get through this, too.  All you have to do is be lazy for a few more months and we'll have babies.  Don't lose hope, not now, not when we can fix this..."  
  
"God...I'm crying like a little bitch," she choked out when she felt one of the babies move.  Steve smoothed his fingers through her hair.  
  
"You're allowed, hell, this is scary, but we're both too stubborn to give up on this," Steve said.  She reached up and swiped at a scratch on his cheek.  He winced and pulled her close again.  
  
"You should get cleaned up.  You can't skip debriefing because of me," she said, wiping her cheeks uselessly.  God, she was a mess.  Steve was right, they were going to have these babies.    
  
"I'd skip everything for you.  I don't want you to go through this alone," Steve said.  
  
"I need your head in the big game, not at home.  JARVIS had my back.  You didn't walk off a mission, did you?" she asked, alarmed.  
  
"No, I stayed until cleanup started.  Bucky and Tony got the call, too, but we all stayed on site until it was cleared," Steve said quietly.  
  
"Hey.  Good.  Bruce and JARVIS were here and they can do more for me when stuff like this happens.  You're here now.  I'm sorry I freaked," Maria replied.  
  
Steve swiped his thumbs under her eyes.  "I won't tell anyone.  Just don't make it a habit.  You're going to be fine.  You're fine."  
  
"Okay.  I'm fine."  She pulled his hand over to her stomach so he could feel the twins kicking unsettledly.  "They're fine."  
  
"God, I don't know what I would do if anything happened to you," Steve whispered, leaning in for a kiss.  The kiss steadied her more than any of the words before.  "It killed me to have to stay out there when I knew you were in trouble."  
  
"Bruce and the medics were here.  Like you said, now we know what it is and we can look out for it," Maria said.  
  
"I wanted to be here."  
  
"Hey, we should be grateful it was only Protocol 5.  It could've been worse.  You look awful, Cap," she said, leaning her head on his shoulder.  "Please let them clean you up before I bribe you to take me to our room."  
  
"They can do it in here while they're telling us more about your care," Steve said.  
  
"Call JARVIS, he should hear this, too," Maria said.  
  
Steve rolled his eyes.  "I'm starting to feel threatened by your relationship with Tony's AI."  
  
"Hey, you're the one that sent Mittens to Clint because of your superstitions," Maria smiled.  
  
"Clint needed a pet," Steve replied.  "And I know Mittens visits when I'm not home so don't change the subject."  
  
She was distracted and warm and okay and she settled her hands on top of Steve's on her stomach.  
  
She was going to do this.  She could do this.  
  
 **head rush**  
  
"I know you're not going to rest any time soon so these things aren't going to heal until then.  You get stitches," Bruce said, blocking his view of Maria on the couch with Fury and Coulson holding vigil and trying not to look worried.  " _Steve_."  
  
"I know, she's fine," Steve said.  Bruce pinched him.  "Ow."  
  
"You have to hold it together, Cap.  If you're worried, she's going to worry about you being worried," Bruce said, raising an alcohol swab to swipe at his scratches.  
  
"She _cried_ , Bruce, she's scared and that scares me," Steve said.  
  
"She's also tough as nails.  You both need to keep the faith.  If she keeps following instructions and keeps her ass in bed, then this is going to be fine.  We all knew this was going to be a difficult pregnancy, this is just a hiccup," Bruce said.  "Look at me.  This is not as bad as it sounds.  She's going to get through this and so are the twins."  
  
"God.  I'm sorry you have to give me another pep talk," Steve sighed.  
  
"How'd the battle go?" Bruce asked now that he had his attention.  
  
"Robots again, but Tony's going to redesign everyone's armor since their claws got us," Steve said.  "We held it together but if I'd gotten the call earlier in the battle, I don't know if I could say that.  I'm glad you were here."  
  
Bruce swiped at another gash and Steve felt the sting now that he was focused on something other than Maria.  "I don't know if you've noticed, but we're all a little invested in your family unit.  Not many people like us get to have families and I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you get yours."  
  
"Ours.  You guys are family, too," Steve said.  "You're definitely on the babysitter list."  
  
"I don't know how the Big Guy will handle babies," Bruce said quietly.  
  
Steve reached up and squeezed his shoulder.  "I've seen him protect women and children before and we trust you, like an uncle.  You don't get out of diapers that easy."  
  
Phil cleared his throat.  "Nick's tucking in Maria and I've been instructed to tell you to debrief, shower and go to bed.  Also, there's dinner in the refrigerator but she is not a domesticated housewife."  
  
"Nick's actually tucking her in?" Bruce asked.  
  
"They talk about the wedding.  Fury has very serious opinions about floral arrangements," Steve said.  Nick had a habit of turning up close to bedtime to check on Maria a few times a week.  
  
"Stark and Barnes are in there, too, so the pillow forts should distract them long enough for us to get your report and time to clean up," Phil said.  
  
"I am not a domesticated house-husband," Steve said.  "But get the voice recorder and I'll dictate the report while Bruce finishes disinfecting me."  
  
He was grateful for his friends.  He couldn't do this without them.  
  
Maria was asleep when he was finally cleared to go to his bedroom when Bucky and Tony took his place in front of the leftovers.  
  
Nick sat quietly by the window, standing up when he stepped in.  "Good job today, Captain."  
  
"Thank you," Steve said, tearing his eyes away from the bundle of blankets.  
  
"I'd give you time off if I could, well, if you worked for me at all but I need you out there," Fury said.  "I'm sorry you weren't here, but it's part of having a family and being a soldier."  
  
"I know," Steve replied.  "Doesn't mean I have to like it."  
  
"You're never going to have puppies and picket fences, Cap.  But you can have this if you play your cards right," Fury said, clapping him on the back.  "But I'd like to encourage you to veto lilies at the wedding."  
  
He caught Maria's smile when he'd closed the door behind the man.  "Did you hear all that?"  
  
"I just bring up lilies to rile him up.  Can you come to bed now?"  
  
"Yeah.  Thought maybe we could spoon while I can still get my arms around your waist," Steve said, climbing into bed.  She poked him hard and settled against him.  
  
" _Sleep_ ," she whispered.  
  
 **beep**  
  
"Wedding gifts are easy, cut a check and done, but baby gifts, for babies I'm going to deal with on a daily basis is a whole new ball game," Tony said.  
  
Maria shimmied uncomfortably on the bed and Steve's eyes snapped to her from his seat by the window with his sketchbook.  "I can't see over my stomach," she said before he could ask if she was okay.  
  
Steve immediately got up to add to her Throne of Fluffy Pillows so she could see Tony.  "Continue," she said, making room for Steve to stretch out beside her.  
  
The babies kicked when he placed his hand over her swollen belly.  He smiled warmly.  
  
"We need to hire extra dentists, you guys are rotting my teeth here," Tony groaned.  "But back to baby gifts."  
  
"Tony, you don't need to get us anything else, you've already given us way too much," Steve said.  
  
"And we live in your Tower rent-free," Maria added.  
  
"Pennies," Tony scoffed.  "But it only reinforces that I can't just throw money at our newest additions."  
  
It was comforting, now that she was soft, to have all the Avengers closing ranks around her and Steve's accidental family.  
  
"Should I have a bad feeling about this, JARVIS?" Steve asked their invisible hall monitor.  
  
"It is always recommended when speaking with Sir, Captain," JARVIS replied.  
  
"Liar, he's a big liar," Tony protested.  "He helped me with these!"  
  
Maria couldn't hide her surprise when a small, waist-high robot whirred its way into the room with Mittens trotting behind it with her tail raised high in approval.  
  
"Oh no," Steve whispered.  
  
"Meet NAN-E.  She's more like DUM-E than JARVIS," Tony said proudly, patting the rounded head of the bot.  
  
"We don't need a robot, Tony, that thing's not getting near my babies," Maria said.  She wasn't terrified but she had a feeling children might not like silver-clawed robots.  
  
"It's more for you guys," Tony said.  "Two kids means you won't have any hands free to get stuff.  She can anticipate your needs for fresh diapers and things and pass them to you; she'll do general tidying up.  She'll even prepare and test the formula's temperature."  
  
The robot reached out a claw and poked Maria curiously.  Something whirred and a compartment opened.  Its arm retracted inside and returned with a handheld breast pump.  
  
"That thing's not getting near my wife's breasts either," Steve said, horrified.  The robot rolled to his side of the bed and retrieved an airplane bottle of vodka and held it out to him.  
  
Maria laughed so hard that she thought she was going to pee her pants.  "Jesus, Stark."  
  
Tony gave her a downfallen look.  
  
"We can't keep it," Steve said.  
  
The robot rolled back to her side and held out a bottle of apple juice.  She took the bottle and patted its metal head.  
  
" _No_ , Maria," Steve said.  
  
"It won't hurt the kids?" Maria asked Tony.  It was too funny (and allegedly useful) to turn down.  She knew how much Steve loved Tony's toys and it would only be a matter of time before he was taking the thing for walks.  
  
"Well, if anyone that JARVIS doesn't recognize gets too close to them, she has an alarm and a fire extinguisher, that goes for intruders and fires," Tony replied.  "Hey, NAN-E, playpen."  
  
The robot rolled away from Maria and a small cube popped out, expanding into a mesh box.  Several plush balls shot from her middle and bounced inside the playpen.  
  
"Bedtime," Tony said.  The bot started playing a soft lilting lullaby and lights displayed fading constellations and shooting stars and rainbows on the ceiling.  
  
"Disco," Maria said.  
  
NAN-E's head started to spin as it lit up with colored strobe lights.  
  
"Absolutely not," Steve frowned.  
  
Mittens rubbed against the the robot and the mechanical arm held out a cat treat.  
  
"You are not getting a thank you card," Steve said, crossing his arms melodramatically.  
  
"As long as you accept it and I don't have to set foot in a baby store, that's fine with me," Tony replied, winking at Maria.

God help them all if this worked.


	4. Chapter 4

_It was my turn to decide  
I knew this was our time  
No one else will have me like you do  
No one else will have me, only you_

  
**family**  
  
"Are you actually knitting?" Maria asked, narrowing her eyes at her mother sitting by the window.  
  
"I had to find something to do with my empty nest," Rose replied, clicking the needles with an intensity that made Maria smile.  
  
"I thought you were doing Professor George," Maria teased.  
  
"Hush.  He's just a friend," Rose scolded, failing to hide her smile.  
  
Bucky walked into the room.  "Boss, did I leave a clip - there it is.  Morning, Rose."  He kissed Rose's cheek absently and retrieved a gun clip from the end table.  
  
"You can't leave things like that lying around when the twins come," Rose said.  
  
"Sorry," he smiled crookedly, mussing Maria's hair because he knew she couldn't chase him and ducked out of the room.  
  
She sighed.  "Steve's drawing up safety protocols but he keeps adding things.  We'll probably have to put them in bubbles for a while."  
  
Rose snorted.  
  
"Maria - um.  Hey, Rose," Clint stopped in his tracks.  
  
"What's up?  I'm not allowed to ask if you have a mission - " Maria started, avoiding her mom's buildup to glare.  
  
"Well, sort of.  Not for work," Clint replied.  "Uh.  It's your night to cook and Steve's still in Michigan so...um.  We're supposed to ask if you can ask your mom to cook."  
  
"I can possibly do that," Maria replied.  "Anything else?"  
  
"NAN-E chased Mittens onto the roof again.  But yeah, that's it.  Bye, Rose."  
  
Rose whistled and the shiny robot rolled into the room and took the knitting needles from her and settled onto its charging station to continue the pattern.  
  
"I don't know why you're worried about being a good mother, you're taking care of a family already.  Houseful of boys, and I'm counting the Russian in that, she's got a mouth on her," Rose said.  
  
"They're grown men, and woman," Maria replied.  "And the whole team dinner thing was Steve's idea, they did it before I moved in.  It took a while to get used to loud, noisy meals again."  
  
"I didn't understand," Rose said softly.  "I mean, when you were hurt, I saw how much they cared, but I still marked it up to soldier solidarity."  
  
"Tony and Steve made this Tower a home for them.  Steve just lets me share his spot," Maria said.  "And now, these beach balls in my belly are going to either bring it all together, or tear it apart."  
  
Rose smiled.  "I don't think you have anything to worry about.  Steve's about to use one of those baby carriers to strap you to his back considering the way he watches you."  
  
"He lost a lot, he holds on tight to what he has," Maria said.  God, she was holding on, too.  
  
Thor stepped into the room, bowing reverently to Rose.  "Lady Hill, greetings to you."  He turned to her and placed his big hand on her stomach.  "And greetings to you as well, Tiny Warriors."  The twins shifted, always aware when Thor was nearby for some reason.  She needed to do more research on Allspeak.  
  
"Your cape's in the closet, Thor, I think Steve put Mjolnr in there, too," Maria said.  The fact that Steve could lift the magical hammer was a secret they didn't let out of the tower.  
  
"Ah, thank you, Lady Rogers," he winked, swaggering out of the room.  
  
Maria stifled a smile at the way her mom slipped into a full-on ogle.  
  
"Well, if I didn't think you were the mother hen already, I definitely do now.  So, what shall NAN-E and I make for dinner?" Rose asked, recovering.  
  
"I tried to make your meatloaf once.  Messed up the recipe, but they still liked it," Maria replied.  
  
"I never gave you that recipe.  You hate recipes," Rosa said, alarmed.  
  
"That's probably why I messed it up," Maria laughed.  
  
 **zero hour**  
  
"Okay, everyone settle down," Fury said, taking charge of the impromptu meeting in their living room.  Steve was warm against her side and it was helping with the knot of panic in her gut from the looming birth date.  
  
In three days, they would have babies and she would have her body back.  
  
"We've all gotten accustomed to using Cap's floor as a meeting place and I'm sure once the children come, it'll stay that way but we have to take precautions that we haven't taken before," Phil said.  
  
"We know the rules, no weapons..." Bucky started.  Rose nodded approvingly but Steve raised his hand.  
  
Maria spoke.  "Considering our jobs, it isn't feasible to be unprotected in our own place."  
  
"So we have another plan.  When you get off the elevator, JARVIS will give a standard reminder.  There will be lockboxes with fingerprint IDs in each room.  They're all out of reach of toddlers but within our reach in case of emergencies.  If you forget to put your weapons away, NAN-E will remind you," Steve said, motioning to the robot wearing a Dodgers cap.  She rolled over to Bucky and reached out with her claw and jolted him with a tiny spark.  
  
"Ow!  Shit, I got it," he said, rubbing his knee from the static shock.  
  
"JARVIS will also be scanning everyone in the elevator, anyone with a fever or a contamination issue won't be allowed contact with the little ones hopefully to keep them as healthy as possible," Bruce said.  "For me, Bucky and Phil, he'll also be checking for signs of anxiety or emotional anomalies, etc.  Just in case."  
  
Phil and Bucky gave soft nods but Maria caught the flash of relief behind his lashes.  
  
"We've cleared a list of approved babysitters in case of emergencies and we'll give codes and instructions for the panic rooms and run through the protocols once we get the biometrics and DNA data from the kids," Natasha said.  
  
"And I'll be here as much as Maria lets me," Rose said.  
  
She rolled her eyes.  Her mother wasn't going anywhere and she'd been too much of a help lately for Maria to ask her.  
  
"Susan Storm, Melinda May, Darcy Lewis, Pepper Potts, Jane Foster, Jemma Simmons, Peter Parker...still not sure how he got on the list but, the list goes on so we'll always have a trained and responsible caretaker.  Even when Rose is available, we still want someone capable of extra defense within reach," Steve explained with an apologetic look to her mother.  
  
Rose crossed her arms but didn't protest.  
  
"You've seen what kind of things we fight, Mom," Maria said.  
  
"I didn't say anything.  It's a good idea if they follow the rules," Rose conceded.  
  
"Okay, with security out of the way," Phil resumed.  "We have basic instructions for those of you with no previous interactions with children."  
  
"Oh God," Clint muttered, alarmed.  
  
"Three days and we're going to have to learn it anyway," Tony chimed in.  
  
Thor walked in cradling a tiny baby she decided was about 8 months old.  "Where did you get that child, Thor?"  
  
"Harriet has been loaned to us by one of Jane's research assistants," Pepper said, following him in.  
  
"She is very hungry and requires immediate sustenance," Thor said.  "Who would like to be the first to practice?"  
  
Clint took an exaggerated breath and stood up.  "I am taking this one for the team."  
  
"Everyone will get a turn, but let's start the updated tour.  Maria hasn't been mobile enough to see the final result of the nursery but she'll need to know her way around, too," Nick said.  
  
Steve was always way too eager to move her from the sofa or bed to the wheelchair and he lifted her easily into the chair.  He kissed her before moving behind the chair and starting the trek ten feet across the room to the hallway she'd been forbidden to travel.  She wasn't a fan of surprises but Steve had yet to let her down.  The nursery was his project and had given him an outlet for his energy and frustration at not being able to help her when she was laid up.  
  
She was excited about the babies but so much more excited about being allowed to walk around and move.  
  
Steve, her mother and her friends had done more of the arrangements for the babies than she had and she was itching to get her hands in on it.  
  
God help her, she wanted to get Steve's ring on her finger.  
  
"This is the spare bedroom for sitters and overnight watches," Steve said, opening the door beside the nursery.  "There are baby monitors in each room on the floor but the two-way mirror and attached door serves a lot of purposes.  If one twin is sleeping, we can bring the crying one into this room."  
  
There was a futon, a full size bed and several cushy chairs as well as a TV and stereo system built into the wall.  It was elaborate like all of Tony's rooms but the curtains over the large window that viewed the nursery showed her mother's touch.  
  
She'd seen the nursery in its early stages but she couldn't believe her eyes when she saw the finished work through the window.  
  
"We figured when they were big enough to have their own rooms, we'd take out the glass and let them have adjoining rooms and share the bathroom," Tony explained, opening the door so Steve could push her into the nursery.  She didn't mention the long-termed-ness of his statement but she also didn't plan on asking Steve to move out any time soon considering their jobs and small community of friends in the Tower.  
  
This was their _home_.  
  
"You finished them...they're beautiful, Steve," she said when she saw the cribs with ornately carved legs and railings.  Tiny ivy leaves wound around the wood with delicate details underneath the varnish.  
  
"Susan wants them if she ever convinced Reed to let her have babies," Natasha said.  Maria hid her smile when Pepper gave her a narrowed glare.  Interesting.  
  
Clint walked in with the practice baby and held her out to Tony.  "You get to have the diaper changing lesson since I went first."  
  
 **reckoning**  
  
"Don't look down there.  It makes you twitchy," Maria slurred, squeezing his hand.  Rose smiled at him from the opposite side of the gurney.  
  
"Sorry.  I'm still not sure if you're pranking me about this whole 'father has to be in the room' thing," Steve said.  He hated seeing Maria surrounded by doctors hooked up to IVs, no matter what the situation.  He swallowed thickly.  
  
One of the nurses pushed a plastic bin into his free hand so he wouldn't contaminate everything if he got sick.  
  
"You're both doing fine.  I'm not surprised my daughter's tougher than you," Rose said.  
  
"Everybody knows that," Steve replied absently.  
  
"You may feel a little pressure, but we're almost done," the doctor said from where he was _cutting her open_ behind the curtain.  
  
"Twins," Steve said.  He wouldn't fully grasp the concept of having kids of his own, fucking twins, until he saw them.  
  
"We're losing him," Maria smiled, squeezing his fingers again.  "Focus, babe."  
  
"I love you," Steve said.  
  
"I know," Maria sighed.  
  
"Say it back," he frowned and she laughed.  
  
"I love you, too."  
  
A baby's cry filled his senses and took his air.  Another wail joined in and he reconsidered passing out.  
  
"Captain Rogers, meet your son.  We'll let Grandma hold your daughter," the doctor said, swiping gunk from the tiny swaddled baby as he placed him in Steve's arms.  
  
"One of each.  _Crazy_ ," Maria said, blinking groggily, rolling her head between the two before settling her gaze on Steve.  "Hey.  Happy?"  
  
"Crazy happy," Steve said, leaning over and kissing her cheek through the paper mask without jostling the tiny squirming thing in his arms.  Baby.  His son.  He was wrinkled and smushed but his eyes were bright blue.  "He's tiny."  
  
"They're beautiful, baby," Rose said, her face bright with joy.  
  
The nurses caught his attention.  "We need to examine them, we'll bring them back intact."  
  
"Make sure Bruce gets to check them, too," Maria said.  
  
"I'll stay with her, go tell your friends," Rose said.  "You're still looking a little dazed and I need your head in the game."  
  
He glared at her and Maria giggled.  
  
"I need a nap, I'll be fine with Mom," Maria said, patting his arm.  "Go make sure our friends are behaving."  
  
"Don't go far," Steve said, grasping her hand and letting one of the orderlies usher him out of the room.  
  
"Cap?" Natasha spotted him and raised an inquiring eyebrow.  
  
He felt like he was sleepwalking as he made his way to the waiting room.  Everyone went silent when he stepped in.  "Everyone's okay.  It's a boy and a girl."  
  
Bucky embraced him immediately.  "Fuck man, congratulations."  He leaned back and held his shoulders.  "Your mom would be so goddamn proud."  
  
"My mom would wash your mouth out with soap," Steve said, his body prickling with shock.  "I can't - they let me hold the boy, my son..."  
  
"Already with the favoritism, you better cuddle that baby girl, too," Natasha said, poking him when Bucky kept his arm around his shoulders but released him to greet the rest of his friends.  
  
"She did it, it's...I have - twins -" Steve didn't think he could talk anymore but his friends didn't hold it against him.  
  
"Steve," Tony said suddenly, turning him to the door where Rose was standing with a stricken expression  
  
"She needs to talk to you, she's okay, she just needs to see you," Rose said, failing to calm his immediate panic.  
  
He went to her side and forced himself to slow down so she could keep up.  "What happened?"  
  
"She's bleeding more than she should.  They're fixing it, but she needs to talk to you," Rose said in a tight voice.  
  
He didn't have a chance to ask for an explanation because a nurse led him to Maria's side.  "Hey, _hey_ , what's all this?"  
  
"There you are," Maria smiled when he cupped her cheek.  She was paler than when he left and he held her gaze instead of interrogating the doctors.  
  
"Yeah, what..."  
  
"There won't be any more," Maria whispered.  "It's still a mess down there."  
  
He let out a breath and squeezed her hand as he kissed her.  "All I want is you, Maria.  Whatever it takes, I want you healthy and _here_."  
  
"But..." she shuddered.  
  
"No buts.  If we ever want any more kids, we can get them from Craigslist, I want the doctors to do whatever it takes to get you back on your feet.  I can't deal with two newborns and your mother without you," Steve said.  
  
"You can't actually buy children on Craigslist anymore," Rose offered quietly.  
  
Maria sighed.  "I love you."  
  
"I'm glad," Steve said.  She glared at him, the spark of annoyance enough for him to place another kiss.  "Because I love you too."  
  
 **meet and greet**  
  
Natasha and Bucky were waiting impatiently when the nurses directed him to a private hospital room.  
  
"Sorry about that, she's okay," Steve said.  He allowed Bucky to support some of his weight with a steadying arm.  "They fixed it, she'll be okay, and that's all that matters to me right now, she should know that...God, Andrew and Sarah are healthy and I need her here and healthy, too..."  
  
"Oh my God, you named her after your mom, you sappy asshole," Bucky blurted out, pulling him into a suffocating hug. "She would be so proud, Stevie."  
  
He didn't mean to cry but Bucky was crying and he was so goddamn happy.  
  
"What the hell is this?" Natasha demanded.  "You're crying more than the newborns."  
  
"Steve, they're beautiful," Rose said, escorting Bruce and the two rolling cribs into the room.  Cleaned up and settled, he could see Andrew's dark hair like his mother and Sarah's lighter blondish baby hair like him.  He had _children_.  Shit.  
  
"And despite the complications, they're completely healthy," Bruce smiled.  
  
Rose reached up and wiped his cheeks, planting a kiss on his cheek. "Andy would be over the moon."  
  
"Now stop crying and say hello to your children," Natasha ordered.  "And stop making my boyfriend cry."  
  
"Support the head, that's right," Rose instructed Bucky who had taken Andrew into his cushioned metal arm.  
  
"Boyfriend?" Steve whispered as he carefully cradled Sarah.  
  
"He's growing on me," Natasha said, glancing at him fondly.  
  
"Like a fungus?" Steve smiled.  
  
"He treats me like a lady even though he knows I'll never be one," Natasha said.  "But if you tell him I like it, I'll kill you."  
  
"Noted," he said, looking at Sarah's curious eyes.  
  
"Okay.  I give up.  Let me hold her," Natasha sighed, making grabby hands.  
  
"They're so small, is it okay for them to be this small?" Bucky asked.  
  
"They're healthier than any of us expected," Bruce admitted.  "Twins are always considered high risk and Maria carried them to full term and they're fully developed."  
  
"Do you think..." Steve started.  
  
Bruce shook his head quickly.  "We're not running _those_ tests here," he said under his breath.  "You'll be able to take the twins home tomorrow, Maria may have to stay a little longer."  
  
"We have to go home together," Steve said.  "Is she..."  
  
"She's going to be fine, she just needs a little more monitoring before she's 100%," Bruce said.  
  
"What happened?" Natasha asked quietly.  
  
"There was bleeding.  She won't be able to have any more kids, but she's supposed to be okay," Steve said, studying Bruce's face for reassurance.  
  
"And she will be.  We'll have the twins home and settled so she won't have to worry about anything," Bruce said.  
  
"Bucky and I will stay with Maria," Natasha decided.  "Bruce is right, we already have an exit plan in place, it would be nice if we didn't have to go off script."  
  
"What kind of exit plan?" Steve frowned.  
  
"Tony and Pepper are offering a distraction for little Sarah so Rose and Thor can take her home.  Clint and Melinda are walking out with Andrew and you and everyone else are leaving in one of the UPS trucks.  The Fantastic Four are going to be having a public training session with the NYPD to draw any lingering superhero snoops across town," Natasha explained.  "Bucky and I can look after Maria while you look after these little people."  
  
Nurses rolled Maria into the room and locked the brakes of the hospital bed.  She was half awake, her damp hair still plastered to her head.  He left Sarah with Bruce and Natasha and went to her side, taking note of IV hooked up to the blood bag.  
  
"Mmm.  Hate waking up in hospitals," Maria said, closing her eyes when he kissed her cheek.  "Like waking up with you, though.  Sure that'll get old eventually," she murmured.  
  
"Never," Steve smiled.  "How do you feel?"  
  
"Numb.  Haven't held the babies yet, gimme," Maria said, her pupils still dilated but the anesthesia slowly wearing off.  "I worked hard for those things."  
  
Rose brought Andrew over and carefully placed him in her arms before reaching up to push her hair out of her face.  "You didn't have to name him after your father."  
  
"Names are important," Maria whispered, quiet with awe at her son squiggling in her arms.  
  
"We want to honor the people that made us who we are.  Sarah Rose and Andrew James Hill.  But don't tell Bucky yet because it'll make him cry and Natasha already put me on notice," Steve whispered, avoiding Rose's eyes so she wouldn't comment on her own name tag.  
  
"The name's probably going to be the only thing they get from Dad's influence.  Steve hates football."  
  
"Blasphemy!  But basketball is acceptable," Rose said, failing to hide her shining eyes.  
  
"Baseball," Steve frowned, taking Sarah and swapping babies with Maria so she could hold her daughter before he made her sleep.    
  
"I'm going to protest the wedding if you don't get your man in line," Rose replied.  
  
"This was the longest nine months of my life, but it worked," Maria said.  "I can't believe it worked.  Look at them."  
  
Steve felt like his face was going to split with his smile but he never thought he could have this.  Maria, Andrew and Sarah, a family.  God.  
  
Tony's hand was tight on his shoulder.  "Congratulations, Steve."  
  
Steve smiled at him and tucked back the blanket so Tony could see more of Andrew.  "Do you want to hold your new godson?"  
  
"What?" Tony whispered, slightly pale.  "But Bucky..."  
  
"Bucky's already his uncle," Steve said, glancing at Bucky and Natasha talking with Clint, Phil and Bruce.  
  
"Plus, Drew's middle name is James.  We'd like you and Pepper to be their godparents since we can't ask JARVIS and NAN-E," she added.  
  
Steve looked at Tony and ignored the wetness of his friend's eyes.  "We know you'll take care of them if something happens.  If you're up for it."  
  
"Shut up and let me hold the kid," Tony said, wiping his eyes.  
  
" _Come on_ , Steve, now you're making Tony cry?" Natasha called across the room.  
  
"Sad to tell you, honey, but there's going to be a lot of crying in your future," Rose smirked as Sarah started to wail.  
  
 **birthrights**  
  
"Still on extra light duty," Maria sighed when she limped slowly into the apartment after shaking off Bucky and Natasha's supervision and insisting they shower.  
  
"Language, Maria, there are children present," Clint grinned from the window where he was perched with Mittens on his lap keeping watch.  
  
Rose and Thor were sitting on the couch holding Drew and Sarah while NAN-E hummed in front of them with burping towels and pacifiers at the ready as the twins fed from the bottles.  
  
"Welcome home, Maria," Thor said, entirely too comfortable with her tiny son in the crook of his arm.  "Your tiny warriors have missed you."  
  
"Sit down before I have to scold you," Rose said, scooting over so she could sit down between them.  "We had to guilt Steve into sleeping.  He needs energy to hover over all three of you."  
  
"Director Fury did not let us have equal time last night," Thor frowned as he passed the docile Drew to her, still nursing contentedly from the formula.  
  
"Do we need to leave before you flash us?" Clint asked.  
  
"I already drained before I left the hospital," Maria replied absently.  Her mother snorted but she was too intent on learning about her new son.  Her tiny little boy.  
  
"They missed you while you were gone," Thor said.  
  
"Why do you keep calling them 'tiny warriors'?" Maria asked as she studied her child.  
  
"They have their parents' spirit and valor," Thor smiled.  "Clint, let us find sustenance so I can send more photographs to my beloved Jane."  
  
Bucky stepped in and leered at Rose.  "You could be a little less obvious in your ogling."  
  
Her mother snapped her gaze from Thor's behind and narrowed in annoyance at him like she would do for one of her own children.  
  
"Take Drew, Bucky, so I can give fair attention to my girl," Maria said as Bucky took Thor's vacated seat.  She took Sarah carefully, the dull pain of her stitches reminding her she wasn't at full strength no matter how much she needed to be.  
  
"I still can't believe you named him James," Bucky said softly.  
  
"Why?  You're family," Maria said.  
  
He shook his head and glanced at her.  "You really don't get it?  I thought you would get it."  
  
She frowned.  "Get what?"  
  
"You trust me.  You trust me the way I am now.  You...don't think of me as _James_.  All the...stuff attached to that name, my name, it's...irrelevant.  Because you named your kid after me anyway," Bucky said.  
  
"I don't get it," Rose said.  
  
"You're not supposed to," Maria hushed her before giving her full attention to Bucky.  "Hey.  None of us think of you like that.  That's not the James we named him after."  
  
Bucky nodded as Drew fidgeted.  He put the bottle aside and NAN-E beeped nearby and passed him a burping towel and took the bottle for cleaning.  
  
Maria followed his example when Sarah decided she'd had enough, too and the room sank back into silence.  
  
"Steve was born premature.  The doctors didn't think he'd live through the night.  His mom never gave up, she'd say that every time he cried, every time he woke her up in the middle of the night, it was a gift from God.  Nothing in the world meant as much to her as he did."  He smiled at Sarah's soft belch on her shoulder.  "He would have never enlisted if she'd been alive.  She wouldn't have given a damn about Captain America, she was proud of him for just surviving.  But this, knowing he has children; healthy, strong children - that he lived long enough to have this - it would mean everything to her."  
  
"I get that," Rosa said quietly.  "Why don't you two put the babies down so you can go wake up your man.  I'm going to start lunch because you've got a pretty long visitor's list this afternoon."  
  
"Thanks, Mom," Maria said honestly.  She was careful standing up and followed Bucky and NAN-E into the nursery and put the settled babies into their cribs.  Bucky stood over them for a moment and Maria put her hand on his shoulder.  
  
"You're not going anywhere, Bucky.  You're a part of this, too," she said.  "You're family."  
  
He nodded.  "I know."  
  
"You and Natasha could..."  
  
Bucky shook his head with a sad smile.  "Russians took care of that for both of us.  This is all we get to have and it's enough.  We couldn't handle _this_ , but you and Steve can.  And we get to have the good parts without the responsibility of parenting."  
  
"You're not going to spoil our children," Maria said.  
  
"That's Tony's job," Bucky smirked.  "But we're all planning on spoiling your kids, Boss."  
  
 **allies**  
  
Steve smiled when he saw Maria and Mittens taking an impromptu nap by the window with Susan Storm on one side with Drew and Johnny on the other with Sarah.  Ben hovered behind them, but so far, he'd been too scared of his stone strength to hold either of the children.  Steve knew how gentle the man could be underneath the rock but he appreciated the care his friends were taking with the tiny lives in their hands.  
  
Fury was across the room talking with Professor Xavier and Reed Richards and keeping a stern watch over the babies.  The Director was a fierce surrogate grandfather and Steve couldn't bring himself to mistrust the man in regard to his children despite his shady connections.  
  
Coulson and Fury's phones went off at the same time and Steve was immediately at attention, waiting for their explanations until Fury gave him a sharp look.  
  
"We're not on the clock, remember?" Clint said, taking the seat beside him.  
  
"Oh," Steve replied.  "Paternity leave, got it."  
  
"How are you doing with all this?"  Steve didn't fight his grin and Clint snorted.  "You're such a sap."  
  
"And there's nothing wrong with that," Steve countered.  
  
"True," Clint replied.  "This is big, you know?  The Four and the X-Men have never really worked with SHIELD.  But you and Tony, well, you've brought them in as allies of The Avengers.  But that's not even the biggest thing.  If you and Maria can pull this off and raise a family, it's going to give a lot of people the courage to start families of their own despite our job descriptions.  Phil's talking about letting us get a dog."  
  
Steve laughed.  "How does Mittens feel about that?"  
  
Clint shrugged.  "She'll understand.  She knows she'll always be Maria's first kid anyway."  
  
Reed and Xavier were playing rock-paper-scissors across the room.  "I don't see how that's fair when Xavier's a telepath."  
  
Johnny spoke up, waving his phone without jostling Sarah.  "Stand down, guys, Spiderman's got it.  He'll check in if he needs backup and he'll debrief via email if the bad guy's on one of your lists."  
  
"I don't even know Spiderman," Steve admitted.  
  
"Tony and Bruce know him because of _science_ ," Clint shrugged.  "I think Johnny knows him because of _drunk_."  
  
Maria stirred and her eyes searched the room before settling on him.  She smiled and the sunlight glinted off her ring.    
  
"No going back now," Steve said.  
  
Clint bumped shoulders with him.  "Since you pinned that one down, there's never been any chance of that."

**Author's Note:**

> Lyrics from Chapter 1 belong to Taking Back Sunday.


End file.
